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102 SPIRIT AND THE MIND
there isn’t anything I can do with it. Maybe I’m just going to have to live with it for awhile.”
S: Anything like resigning yourself to going over the waterfall when you were on that log in the dream?
A: A little bit.
S: Did you think, “No more struggling,” because you knew that struggling wasn’t going to help—the water was too fast, so you were resigned to just riding it?
A: Yes.
S: And was there a calm that went along with that surrender in the dream?
A: I don’t remember; it was too quick.
S: How long did it take you to get back to your regular thinking? A: I guess after Jim came over to me and asked all these
questions. I sort of articulated a little bit what I thought had happened, and then we started doing the data collection. It’s all very routine and requires concentration to make the right codes on the computer. It kind of wrenched me back.
S: Did you talk to Jim about your experience? Did you tell him what had happened?
A: No, I still haven’t. There really wasn’t time. S: Did you tell your husband?
A: I talked to him about it, yes.
S: And what was his impression?
A: He was interested because it happened to me. It didn’t make an enormous impression on him. I described all of this and he said, “Well, yes, it’s interesting, but we’ve heard this kind of thing before.” He said that what appears to be the difference between this time and the others is that I never before felt as though it had anything to do with me. And somehow this particular experience struck me more personally than the others. I said, “Yes, I guess that’s it.”
I’ve seen movies at your house where Sai Baba appears to be materializing ash from a big upturned urn, and somehow it never made an impression on me. My psychological or spiritual state at this point allowed me to think that it had something to do with me. My talking about it to my husband didn’t have any affect on him, except that he was real interested that this had happened to me. It really