Page 12 - COBH EDITION 2nd NOVEMBER DIGITAL VERSION

Nobody said it was easy…by Trish Carlos

Nobody said it was easy, nobody said that it would be this hard
either. I studied English at University, I know the hardship,
depression and wrath felt by most writers, the dark places they
go to create their master pieces. I also know that I have spent
my teaching career trying to get teenagers to love and under-
stand the ramblings of dead people, so I really don’t know why I
thought it would be easy to write a book, get it published and live
happily ever after as a writer, drinking coffee and writing books.

I was naive in my quest to become a published writer, writing the
book was the easiest part to be completely honest.
I thoroughly enjoyed the nights with the laptop on my lap or on
the desk, weaving words into the world that Saoirse lives in. I
loved bringing the characters to life, rereading chapters and
realising Rua would never have said that and starting over. The
hard work of writing is something I love, it brings me great pleasure and satisfaction. I also
enjoyed sending it out to publishers, waiting weeks (or months) to get some feedback (good
or bad), the process brought me great joy.

The selfpublishing side to creating a book however does not give me the same satisfaction.
The editing and physical aspects of getting the book to print were fine, (I’m a teacher; edit-
ing is part of my everyday), it was a learning curve that taught me a lot. Going online and
working with Createspace and Ingramspark also made things easier as I didn’t really have a
massive budget to put everything together. Print on demand is wonderful and I don’t have a
spareroom full of unsold books reminding me of the fact that they have gone unsold!
The crux is in the marketing I guess. I’ve found getting the book out there the hardest part.
At the best of times I can be an anxious person and self doubt plagues me. I am forever
doubting my writing ability and the story, I’ve questioned whether I should have ever pub-
lished it, but in my heart of hearts I believe in the story and the characters, I worked hard and
poured myself into it. I love the characters and the landscape I’ve created and when I doubt
myself the most I remind myself that an editor edited this book, believed in it enough to take
it on and that it will be there long after me, telling the folklore of my beautiful island to gen-
erations after me.

But I still can’t get it out there. I’ve been brave, I’ve put up videos, I have sent it to people,
hoping they would give it a mention and it would miraclously fall into the right hands and take
off, that I’d get that publishing deal and I’d be on the pigs back to a writing career. I don’t
have the confidence or expertise I think to keep pushing, to knock on doors and scream from
the roof tops ‘I wrote this fabulous book, you have to read it.’ I’m working on that, writing this
alone is a start.
On top of all that selfpublishing requires you to be all women to all men, you have to be the
online influencer, the marketing guru, the sales expert, the PR firm, the public figure and of
course the writer. None of that takes into consideration the reality of most selfpublished or
even published writers; their ‘real’ jobs. I have two real jobs, both very taxing and exhaust-
ing. I am a mother to two boys and I am a secondary teacher, my real jobs finish roughly
about nine o clock and then the writing job kicks in. I was very didicated and headstrong in
the run up to the launch in 2016 and I guess I burnt myself out. I was trying too hard to do
everything and just couldn’t.
Last year we moved, this left me without a space physically and mentally to write. I’ve felt
lost at sea, unable to do anything creatively for the past twelve months and that gets on top of
you.