Page 10 - Hamden Winter 2019 Issue 2

Legal Spotlight
LOVEyour CHILD MORE
Attorney Reneé Bauer
Things with my ex-husband were not always perfect but one thing remained constant we loved our son more than we ever disliked or or even resented each other I’m a a a a divorce lawyer so I I witness what happens to children whose parents can’t look past their own issues every day The fallout is is behavioral problems increased use of alcohol or drugs sexual promiscuity anxiety and depression It is not always easy to co- parent parent and it it certainly takes two parents to do it it the right way The following is a a a a good starting place:
1 Communication Communication is everything Communication Communication includes not just the the big things but also the the small stuff Share photos of your child with the the other parent Let them know when your child stays home from school sick Discuss rules so they are consistent in both homes Communicate about what you are buying for birthday and other holiday gifts Use a a a a a a shared calendar for all appointments and activities Your child should never be the one to transport information from one parent to another Once you create a a a a a habit of communication it gets easier and your child will not be able to manipulate either parent for their benefit (you will appreciate this most when they are a a a teenager) than you your HATE
EX
I woke up groggy My head was slightly achy and the balls of my feet throbbed from wearing high heels for over 10 hours yesterday I touched my hair and felt a a a a a knot that had set in from too much hairspray and my eyes felt heavy from eye eye make-up that was not completely removed last night Then I I smiled Last night night was an unforgettable night night I I couldn’t wait to to see the photos that would trickle in today from guests It was not the morning after my wedding Not even close Rather it was the the morning after my son’s bar mitvah I am not Jewish but his dad my ex-husband is is My current husband raised my 3 step-kids with no religion My Ex-husband’s wife grew up in a a mixed religion household Are you keeping up?
At the service yesterday my son had 8 grandparents and 32 relatives there We took up the the entire first 2 2 rows spilling into the 3rd row row too It didn’t matter that we we were redefined reconfigured and redesigned Family is family The morning after my ex-husband and and I texted in in the morning to confirm it was an incredible night Everyone had fun and we both gloated about how proud we we we were of our son He said he thought we we we did a a a good job raising him I agreed 10 2 Bite your tongue Resist the urge to to disparage the the other parent in front of your child While it might make you feel vindicated in in the moment it is hurtful for your child to hear spiteful words about the the other most important person in in their life Instead speaking positively about your child’s other parent encourages
HamdenMag com | Mid-Winter 2019