Page 188 - Meeting with Children Book

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CONCLUSION

This book identifies a number of important issues and
practical skills for family law practitioners to consider
when Meeting With Children. It is not enough to
interview a child using developmentally sensitive
language or to rely on parents to represent their
children’s views. We realized the need to negotiate
the structures and principles upon which the goal of
including children is accomplished. After close
examination of many factors related to achieving this
goal, overall safety, the right environment for
containment of the process, the readiness of parents
to hear children, children’s readiness to share with
parents and third parties, and the practitioner’s skill in
Meeting With Children and parents were paramount.
One factor does not take precedence over another; it
is a systems view to the inclusion of children.

Meeting With Children looks through the meeting
room window and shines the spotlight on how to hear
children and youth, and goes on to emphasize what
types of things children report to be important to
them. Not surprisingly, the salient topics tend to go
beyond what the legal system and parents view as
important. Practitioners are encouraged to enter the
metaphorical language of the child and to hear with
more than their ears. To observe how children see
their worlds allows us to also see a richer, more
detailed picture. “A picture paints a thousand words”
comes back to us all during meetings with children.