Page 452 - the-idiot

sure you, Keller, I reproach myself bitterly for it sometimes.
When you were talking just now I seemed to be listening
to something about myself. At times I have imagined that
all men were the same,’ he continued earnestly, for he ap-
peared to be much interested in the conversation, ‘and that
consoled me in a certain degree, for a DOUBLE motive is a
thing most difficult to fight against. I have tried, and I know.
God knows whence they arise, these ideas that you speak of
as base. I fear these double motives more than ever just now,
but I am not your judge, and in my opinion it is going too
far to give the name of baseness to it—what do you think?
You were going to employ your tears as a ruse in order to
borrow money, but you also say—in fact, you have sworn
to the fact— that independently of this your confession was
made with an honourable motive. As for the money, you
want it for drink, do you not? After your confession, that is
weakness, of course; but, after all, how can anyone give up
a bad habit at a moment’s notice? It is impossible. What can
we do? It is best, I think, to leave the matter to your own
conscience. How does it seem to you?’ As he concluded the
prince looked curiously at Keller; evidently this problem of
double motives had often been considered by him before.
‘Well, how anybody can call you an idiot after that, is
more than I can understand!’ cried the boxer.
The prince reddened slightly.
‘Bourdaloue, the archbishop, would not have spared a
man like me,’ Keller continued, ‘but you, you have judged
me with humanity. To show how grateful I am, and as a
punishment, I will not accept a hundred and fifty roubles.

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