Page 439 - the-brothers-karamazov

Chapter 6

For Awhile a Very

Obscure One

ND Ivan, on parting from Alyosha, went home to Fy-
Aodor Pavlovitch’s house. But, strange to say, he was
overcome by insufferable depression, which grew greater at
every step he took towards the house. There was nothing
strange in his being depressed; what was strange was that
Ivan could not have said what was the cause of it. He had
often been depressed before, and there was nothing surpris-
ing at his feeling so at such a moment, when he had broken
off with everything had brought him here, and was pre-
paring that day to make a new start and enter upon a new,
unknown future. He would again be as solitary as ever, and
though he had great hopes, and great — too great — ex-
pectations from life, he could not have given any definite
account of his hopes, his expectations, or even his desires.
Yet at that moment, though the apprehension of the new
and unknown certainly found place in his heart, what was
worrying him was something quite different. ‘Is it loathing
for my father’s house?’ he wondered. ‘Quite likely; I am so

The Brothers Karamazov