Page 63 - RKJ 2019 Online Flip Version

beheadings were a mascot-wearer's greatest Selphie's ears prickled at the words.
The Superglued Moogle Mascot Mystery
by Erica Seguin (Emerald-Latias)
If looks could kill, Selphie's ear-to-ear Cheshire
grin was attempted murder. Mostly because
the Chocobo beak she was wearing obscured
pretty much everything below her eyes. The
flock of yellow feathers in her hair didn't exactly
scream threatening either, it mostly screamed
too much hair product, but alas, Selphie was
elated.
Out of sheer dumb luck, she'd managed to
bum rush the Moogle into the oversized
kitchen pantry, ending their reign of terror and
thunder-stealing.
Selphie lowered her elastic-bound beak as
she shut the door behind her.
"Jig's up, Moogle. You have no opposable
thumbs and no way of getting out of here
unless you co-operate with me. Tell me who
you are and who sent you. Or strip. The choice
is yours."
Moogle shook their head defiantly. Selphie
raised a brow.
"Holy Carbuncle, you're serious business,
aren't you? I mean, I know my mascots – you
shouldn't have been able to do that with the
Mr. Moogle Model YRP-Mark III without the
head shifting."
She drifted towards the mascot and
nudged the head with an open palm to no
avail. Then she tried yanking it off altogether
with both hands and ended up with the same
result – the damn thing must have been
superglued on. Even still, the strangest thing
wasn't that the head didn't even budge a
fraction of an inch but rather that the person
inside it was just as motionless. Involuntary
fear no matter who they were. At the very
least, Moogle's instinct, regardless of their
apparent and excessive use of superglue,
should have been to clutch at their head.
But remaining totally calm with unflappable
faith in their costume's durability? Unheard of.
Selphie crossed her arms as she casually
mulled over this ever-thickening plot, giving the
Moogle another once over.
"Even if I couldn't unmask you, I did feel
some part of your noggin hit the upper-middle
part of the head when I tried taking it off so
you're not super short. So…this rules out the
possibility that you're my arch-nemesis
Wimbly. Then again, that's a little too
conspiracy-theory-ish even for me so…hey -
don't you dare facepalm when I talk!"
Before she could even wag her finger for
emphasis however, a loud series of knocks on
the door claimed her attention. Selphie's
stomach and pointer finger sunk upon the
realization that she hadn't locked it in her
gleeful haste. And despite her effort to leap to
the other side of the room in a half-second, the
door opened before she could make it there.
When she saw that the interloper was
someone with a shock of pearl-white feathers
and jet-black hair through the widening crack
of the door, Selphie started to deflate.
It seemed as though Rinoa found her at
last, surely to play the angel on her shoulder.
Or rather the white Chocobo flapper girl
crossover version of that. But to Selphie's
surprise, she did close the door behind her
even though she didn't really look all that
impressed with her.
Busted.
"I look the other way for one second and
you go off chasing this poor Moogle." she
chided. "Selphie…what is maiming him going
to achieve? The poor guy probably just wanted
fit in but didn't have a Chocobo costume."
"…You said he, him and guy. So you know
Moogle is a Mr. Moogle?"
"Selphie…"
She could practically feel the facepalm
emanate from her friend's voice. Even still, she
just…didn't understand.
"Rinoa, if it was that, I would have been
totally cool with it. The more the merrier, you
know? Besides, the little yellow chocobo fanny
pack Mr. Moogle has on is cute and I would
have totally made him an honorary Chocobo at
Wark This Way in that case. But this is not
that." Selphie started to explain before pointing
her right finger straight at Moogle's face. "This
hug-giving, fist bump-bestowing, hi-fiving
Moogle is trying to go after my Garden Festival
feather crown. I have many enemies, Rin.
Even more when I decided this would be the
theme this year instead of Merry Moogle
Masquerade. When you factor that in, I can't
overlook the very-real possibility that this
person in a Moogle mascot costume with a
superglued head is trying to sabotage
me and my chances at adding a Chocobo
petting zoo next year by gunning to be the
center of attention."
"…Beyond this sentence, I have no words
for what I just heard Selph." The sorceress
looked beyond her to the object of her derision.
"Moogle, I apologize for my friend. She's
running on practically no sleep the past few
weeks since she decided to run the entire
festival by herself after dismissing all her
helpers."
"Like I had a choice – their utter lack of
commitment was about to ruin everything!" the
brunette corrected, lowering her hand simply to
ball it into a fist at her side. "It had to be done!"
Rinoa couldn't help but sigh as she walked
past her entirely. "You fired them because they
wouldn't paint backdrops at 3 am." she
casually pointed out before reaching out to
Moogle's paw. "C'mon Moogle, let's get you
out of-"