Page 45 - Interior_SPRING SUMMER FALLING_2021

SPRING SUMME R FALLING | 45

Chapter 10

Sanya
T
here comes a time when you must stop lying to yourself. Even a partial lie
cannot continue to live in your psyche. Sometimes, it’s necessary to pull
the plug on the ventilator, watch the lie die, and float away into oblivion.
My lie, you ask? Oh, the little ditty I’ve performed about not being sexually
attracted to Henry. I choose to call it a ditty bebecause I have performed the same
stock refusals so many times that they are almost rhythmic; they should have
rhyming words and be sung as a tune.

I know I had an episode a few weeks ago about being surrounded by his scent.
But, even in that moment, I’d chalked it up to merely having a guy in my space. I’d
successfully convinced myself that it was just me realizing the lack of a male
presence in my life. I have been in denial. What forced me out of self-deceit? Seeing
Henry in almost all of his glory.

I’d wandered out of bed in the wee hours of the night on a mission to quench my
thirst. I usually put a bottle of water on my nightstand, but that night, I’d fallen into
an unexpected slumber that had robbed me of my usual night-time ritual. The soft
glow of the pantry light should have been a clue. It wasn’t, I’d assumed that one of us
accidentally left it on. I saw him before he saw me.
Henri Zidane was in my kitchen wearing nothing but boxer briefs. I would have
drooled if my mouth wasn’t so dry. He must have been thirsty as well because he was
in the process of downing a bottle of water. A resistant drop of water escaped his lips
and trailed down his chin. I’d eagerly watched as it rolled down his neck, across his
left pec, and gathered at his nipple. I wanted to lick that drop. No, I wanted to be that