Page 6 - 21 November 2025

PAGE 6 · THE REPORTER 21 NOVEMBER 2025

think if we added those, we'd can wear it for gardening,
be close to the size of a small sleeping, braaing, and
herd. thinking deep thoughts
about life and rugby
She stood there shaking her
head while I tried to explain selections. It's the working
that every one of those T- man's robe of reflection.
shirts tells a story. There's the I've tried (“not hard enough,”
faded Springbok one from Mrs Lamont would say) to
the 1995 World Cup, the tidy up, to “rationalise” my
grease-stained one from collection. But as soon as I
fixing the old Victa mower, held one up, I remembered
and the blueish one with where I wore it. The collar's
chlorine bleaches from pool more holes than cotton now,
“When is Too Many chemicals. Each shirt carries but when I pull it on, I swear I
Too Many?” the smell of the moment, the can still smell the summer
Ons wens die volgende tagtigjariges van harte geluk memory in the fibres. How days and hear the fizz of a
met hul verjaarsdae en wens hulle alles van die beste could I possibly throw them cold one being opened. How
vir die toekoms toe: I have to confess something: doesn't begin to cover it. away? do you throw that out? That's
I'm a sentimental fool when it Every time I think of it, I want Of course, Mrs. Lamont not laundry, that's history.
We congratulate the following octogenarians on their comes to T-shirts. I form to write an apology to my doesn't buy this sentimental Mrs. Lamont once said she'd
birthdays and wish them everything of the best for the emotional attachments to teenage self, and to any girl nonsense. She says we sneak a few into the rag bag
future: them the way some people who might have seen me could probably fund an when I wasn't looking. I told
do to pets, or old bakkies wearing it. But that was the
Maria Vorster, 83 op 5 Desember overseas holiday if I sold her if she did, I'd have heavy-
Judy Herman, 80 op 31 Desember that don't start unless you start of my lifelong love affair them all. Well, that duty railway tracks installed
talk nicely to them. I've with cotton and bad slogans. suggestion resulted in “no- at the entry to my wardrobe
always been a T-shirt kind of Mrs. Lamont, on the other speaks” for a week, and so nothing could be
guy. The only time I don't hand, views my T-shirt silence can be quite removed without official
wear one is for weddings and collection as evidence of deafening. In our house, clearance. Since then, we've
funerals, and even then, I'm s o m e u n d i a g n o s e d silence is never ordinary. It reached a truce; she does
thinking about which one I'll condition. For years, she's comes with cupboard doors the washing, I do the
put on the minute I get been on at me to “cull” being closed a little too hoarding, and peace is
home.
them. That word is sacrilege firmly, the tea being poured maintained through mutual
It all started when I was about in our house. “Culling” and with unnecessary accuracy, avoidance of the T-shirt
fourteen, in East London. My “T-shirts” go together like and that quiet look that says, cupboard.
mother, being a kind soul “diet” and “chocolate”, or “You brought this on The truth is, I think men's T-
and probably tired of me “budget cuts” and “Barkly yourself, Logan.” It's shirts are like tree rings. You
growing out of school shirts, Municipality.” They just amazing how a house can be can read our lives in them.
said I could pick one shouldn't appear in the same filled with so much noise, There's the beer-spill era, the
“fashionable” T-shirt from sentence. even when nobody's talking. DIY phase, the sports years,
one of those new shops that The other day, to prove her By the end of it, I was almost the fatherhood stretch
sold things with pictures and point, she decided to count ready to sacrifice the ones (usually with handprints of
words on the front. I felt like them. One hundred and with holes under both arms - tomato sauce somewhere
James Dean. almost. near the waist), and finally
thirty-seven. And that wasn't
I still remember that shirt as even all of them. That was There's something com- the retirement period, when
if it were hanging in front of just the visible population, forting about an old T-shirt. all shirts become “good for
me. Across the chest, in not the ones in the laundry It never judges your shape, it pottering around.”
fluorescent pink letters, it basket, on the washing line, doesn't care if you've put on So yes, I'm a T-shirt man,
said: “If love is for the birds, or hiding in the ironing pile a few kilos, and it still fits born and stitched that way. I
I'm a vulture.” Cringe like endangered species. I when nothing else does. You can't promise to cull, but I
might consider rotation, or
perhaps a museum. Until
then, 137 and counting, and
that's not including the one
I'm wearing now, which, as
Mrs. Lamont pointed out,
says “Still got it” across the
chest. I'm not sure about
that, but I'm holding onto
both the shirt and the
attitude. Because you can
take the man out of the T-
shirt, but you'll never take the
T-shirt out of the man.
7:40pm Now that I've laid my soul
bare, I may as well wave the
The Reporter which is registered at the Post Office as flag proudly. “Viva la T-
shirt.”
a newspaper is printed and published by the
proprietors, Barkly East Reporter cc (Reg No. 5:10pm By Logan Lamont
2002/024771/23) at 28 Greyvenstein Street, Barkly
East.
Copyright on all materials in The Reporter reserved
by the proprietors.

Hierdie lys van funksies en gebeure word
gepubliseer in ‘n poging om te verhoed dat
belangrike fondsinsameling pogings bots. Funksies
geplaas op voorwaarde dat ‘n advertensie later
geplaas word. ‘n Rekening sal gestuur word
indien daar nie ‘n advertensie geplaas word nie.
NOVEMBER 2025
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