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NICHOLAS BOOTHMAN
listening to headphones, or crossing their arms and
legs is not inviting a conversation. Be sensitive to the
fact that some people may have a history of obnoxious
intrusions, so if your attempts at conversation aren't
reciprocated, back away gracefully.
Hunt for Common Ground
Once you make the move and speak up, try to find
some common ground. Common ground is the holy
grail of talking to strangers. The moment you find it,
you have a bond. The pressure is off and you can share
your stories and your ideas and your casual chit chat.
The quicker you find things in common, the faster
the connection. To do this, get them talking. The easiest
way to get someone talking is to ask them what they
think about something. If you’re at a convention, ask
them what they think about the transportation, the
hotel, the hours, their first impressions of the place. “Is
this your first trip? What’s your initial impression?”
“What do you think of the view from the observation
deck?”—anything to get them going. Another rapport-
creating question is “How did you end up here?” This
is a story that everybody has to tell, and it’s almost
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