Page 195 - ConvinceThemFlip

open the lines of communication
The Hunt for Common Ground
At the heart of the process of establishing instant rap-
port is a hunt for common ground. We like people
who are like us. To discover we share the same interest
in movies, clothes, vacations, restaurants, TV shows,
football, or skydiving is to find a mutual bond that allows
us to share the familiarity of language and experience and
accelerate the feeling that we already know, understand,
and trust the other person.
The quicker you can find things in common with the
person or people you are connecting with, the faster rap-
port can be established. Venture beyond “Looks like rain”
and “How about them Red Sox, eh?” by using a snippet of
personal or business small talk to set the agenda. “They’re
retooling the engine plant,
so we’re up to our eyeballs
in scheduling. How has it
affected you?”
Even if you don’t have a
shared engine plant or the
like in common, the easiest way to get someone talking is
to ask them what they think about something. If you’re at
a convention, ask them what they think about the trans-
portation, the hotel, the hours, their first impressions
of the place. “Is this your first trip? What’s your initial
To find common ground,
ask questions that
spark the imagination.
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