Page 74 - IFAFA ebook v4

27.

Patrick Scott

I didn't have a typical Irish childhood; my family were 'globally

mobile' as we say now; my father worked in the oil industry and so

between 0 and 18 I lived in Lagos, Calgary, Mallorca, Algiers and

Dublin. The concept of moving house every second year or so was

what I knew and was normal to me. From 0 to 18 my wife Sonja

Hyland moved from one house to another one two roads away in the

same Dublin suburb. So, when she expressed concern about what

the impact of the diplomatic life would be like on our kids, I told

her 'I know, but I sort of don't know, because I didn't know

anything else'. As you can see I was very helpful.

I feel Irish because we always came back to Ireland, but I still feel

a distance, because of certain gaps; not knowing what Wanderly

Wagon was, or Zig'n'Zag. Not having gone to Irish college. Not

having had a First Communion. At my first Mass I misheard the

priest when he asked the congregation to shake hands in peace. I

said 'Hello, how do you do?' to the elderly lady beside me, who was

appalled. I wonder what our kids' equivalent moments of dissonance

will be.

For our kids, the eldest, Louis has lived in Madrid, Mexico City and

Addis Ababa. He speaks fluent Spanish, likes his food, and is very

sociable with adults and children alike and has managed

exceptionally well to adapt and become comfortable in what might

be described as challenging environments. Our younger son,

Alexander, born in Madrid, was perhaps slower to settle into

changed situations, eventually found a rhythm and then sometimes

lost it again before we realized it. The adaptability and enthusiasm

for the change kids live through varies with age. Sonja and I are

optimistic that we will be forgiven, eventually.

As a husband of an Irish diplomat I've become accustomed to being

the only male, or one of few, in the diplomatic spouses groups in

our host countries. I too, am keen on my food, and am not too proud

to say that there's nothing I won't do for a slap-up breakfast or a

coffee morning that involves cakes and pastries. On the other hand,

I've had the opportunity to join others in the same situation and

raise funds for local charitable causes, and explore the cultures

we've been living in. It has been both a privilege and an

opportunity that I – usually – have appreciated to support Sonja in

her representation of Ireland abroad. I'm also proud of what Sonja

has done and the role she plays for our country; Irish diplomats

have to hustle and so I gladly support in the representational parts

65 of the job. And I like to think that us spouses support each other

too in our small circles abroad. I'm not great help with an IKEA

wrench but I at least offer.