Page 175 - Louisiana Loop (manuscript Edition)

Self-analysis. Performance review. After action report. Medical self-evaluation. No matter what you call it or how you
describe there is a certain amount of self-analysis and self-awareness that has to go into you your self.

There is no doubt stress and stressors unless they are dealt with properly and are part of your life can kill you.

Not necessarily my distress stressor itself but by the aftermath you are having all the people around you and the
circumstances of your life that will probably cause you to fall into a situation or circumstance with the stress invokes
upon you and other stressor that you cannot deny or deal with. In those situations don't realize that your mind is taken
over and you obviously don't know what you're doing.
Too often people use words mental health and give each other the willies because unless you dealt with health issues or
have been to a psychologist sociologist counselor or some type of therapy just the words mental health and cause people
to avoid the very issues that they are dealing with personally and professionally.
Because of Crohn's Disease, I have had to do many issues that are directly related to the mind and the health questions
that ordinary people normally wouldn't have to deal with. When I found myself matching some of the symptoms that I
recognized as being related to rest I found myself fascinated by what it happened to me and how some of the events
seem to been compartmentalized and for the moment no recollection or memory of certain moments that have been
blacked out.
I knew then that I was dealing with a high stress that had to be dealt with and I have to come to realization that my
stressors were greater in my ability to cope with. My mind had taken over early and suppressed a memory.

I can honestly say that there's a gap in my recollection of what happened under the barge before I wound up in the water.
I have a clear memory of reaching out square part of the barge over my head, then an apparent gap because the next
memory is coming out of the water.

That is a stress issue and could be labeled an acute stress disorder,
Normal people go through stress stressors without realizing either the damage or defect that stress is having on their life
their emotions in the relationship when people aren't able to realize that the person may not know directly causing their
emotions to be off-center or out of kilter, or in some way inexplicably angry.
This is not to excuse their behavior but it does explain a lot of the violent actions interactions and reaction people are
having that may be caused by PTSD or ASD or a type of stress that they are unfamiliar with dealing with.