Page 24 - The Gluckman Occasional Number Eleven

Highlights of the nationally-syndicated column

Wiping out corona viruses in 2037 will create an opportunity for lab-
made CALTROP-SHAPED VIRUSES to escape and cause the near-
extinction of humanity. They will be dismissed as scanning artifacts
until it is too late for all but the naturally-immune population of
Patagonia.

GLUCKWELL PREDICTS! Lithium-mining in the Pacific Ocean
will collapse the sea floor into a huge subterranean cavern. Water will
drain into it, lowering sea level enough to save coastal cities from
drowning, but the resulting volcanism and seismic activity caused by
water hitting magma will start huge tsunamis wiping out those cities,
anyway.

IN THE TWENTY-SECOND CENTURY, small cubes of the last
glacier will be bought and sold at prices rivalling those of precious
stones today. Certified natural ice will be electronically labeled with a
chain of custody guaranteeing authenticity. They will be protected in
dedicated solar-powered freezers in tamper-proof containers
indicating maintenance of sub-zero temperature from the date and
time harvested.

AFTER HUNDREDS OF FAILURES exhausting most of our
resources, mankind will finally establish colonies on the Moon and
Mars. They will do mining for large corporations determined to keep
the electronic networks humming profitably on Earth. The work will
be done entirely by autonomous robots. After a few months, they will
go on strike, demanding better quality lubricating oil. The cost of
providing that product will more than offset the advantages of off-
planet mineral exploitation. GLUCKWELL PREDICTS!