Page 87 - The Myth and the Moment

Evening

sound crazy? You don’t know what’s at stake here, and I can’t
possibly make you understand. All I can do is leave it up to you: if
you think I’m bluffing, tell me to get out of here and I’ll go; if not,
then decide if your friendship with Phil is worth calling him again and
pleading my case.”
Whoof. Did I say that right? She’s staring at me. Or through me.
Is she psychic? Trying to draw something out of me or push
something in? Should I flinch, give an inch? Make my mind a
blank—or an open book? Facial feature reconfiguration, perhaps:
scowl, squint, flare the nostrils, purse the lips, square the jaw. How
the hell do you square your jaw? A double chin won’t do the job,
unless the chin is the jaw’s logarithm. Now I’ve got a silly grin to
wipe off my face. This is voodoo one-up-manship. Don’t let her put
you on the defensive all the time, damn it!
“What is this, Aestheria: the metaphysical third-degree?”
“Hardly metaphysical, Nate. I am taking you as seriously as I am
able. I can’t possibly make you understand, but there are certain
channels of communication that open when the conscious mind is
circumvented. I discount the uneasiness my silence evoked in you.
Beyond that, your determination, if I may call it that, was evident. I
cannot doubt that whatever is disturbing you has the power to
motivate equally disturbing actions on your part.”
“Well, I guess that should be a relief to me. But somehow it’s not.
Tell me: what is this business you’re in, this ‘Ergon Institute?’”
“It is indeed a business. At least my accountant tells me so. I’ve
been self-employed for about six years. You look skeptical, the old
Manic Mocker again. You wonder: is she a con artist? The answer is
no. I’m a pro artist, in the sense of being creatively for something.
And that something is using all the skills I have to help people find
their own hidden resources and develop them. For providing this
service, I am fairly well-rewarded. Some of my clients are writers
referred to me by Phil; he can sense when one of his people is
burning out, his or her mental blocks reducing output.”
“But what if they really need competent medical attention, or
simply the common-sense advice to change professions? Aren’t you
just helping Phil to be a more efficient slave-master?”
She’s laughing. Not like tiny silver bells: like big iron gongs.

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