Page 30 - SYTYGIB Prehistoric Times
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Diet
SHHH! There it is! Keep quiet . . . it can hear you! The last thing you want is for it to get startled and run away. Or even worse, for it to get angry and CHARGE you and BITE YOUR BOTTOM OFF!
Now creep up on it . . . sLoWlY! Nooooowwww . . . pOuNcE! GaH! You let it get away, you tiny nincompoop!
All you had to do was hunt the doughnut and catch it for your tea, and you fAiLeD MiSeRaBlY!
But if you think YoU’vE GoT iT BaD, trying to catch sugary ring-shaped treats, at least doughnuts don’t have eNoRmOuS TuSkS to jab you with!
Back in the Ice Age periods of the Stone Age, early humans would have scavenged from the dead bodies of enormous woolly mammoths for meat. If you don’t know what a woolly mammoth is, imagine an elephant that’s smeared itself in JaM then rolled around on a barber’s shop floor until it’s CoVeReD in hair!
It's just as well they didn’t hunt mammoths – a beast that hUgE, with pOiNtY TuSkS that could grow up to four metres long, isn’t something you want to get too close to.
But it wasn’t the only unusual creature that would have made up the diet of humans
at certain times. Rhinos, sometimes also woolly, could be on the menu, as could reindeer (none with a red nose, so don’t worry), wild horses and aurochs, which are the ancestors of modern-day cows.
When I said I wanted to supersize my burger meal, this isn´t what I had in mind.
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