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Introduction to החיתפ
Sefer Chafetz Chayim
Laveen םייח ץפח רפסל
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said by adding his own critical comments to the speaker’s remarks רוּצּקִבּ בֹתּכא ןפֹא לכּ םיִללוֹכּ םהֶשׁ ןיִשֲׂעה וֹא ןיואלַּהו
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because the speaker is someone important and the listener wants
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to receive a favor from him or the listener fears the speaker will ןוֹשׁלבּ וּנֵתנוּכו ,"םינפאה 'חה לכ"בּ םייּח םימ ראבּהבּ
otherwise think he is unintelligent. The listener’s Yetzer Hara ןיבוּ רפּסְמל ןיבוּ וינפבּ אלֶֹּשׁו וינפבוּ תוּליִכרְוּ ערָה
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compels him to agree to the speaker’s comments because he is
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“pressured” into it. But my brother, understand that this is the םירִבדּה וּלּא רֹכזוּ ,רקֶֶשׁ לע ןיבוּ תמא לע ןיבוּ לבּקְַמל
essence of the prohibition against flattery, that it applies even if
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the listener adds only one point to the speaker’s remarks, as I will .וֹזּה החיִתְפּבּ םיִמעְפּ הבּרְה םלְפּכא אלֹ יִכּ
explain in the Be’er Mayim Chayim.
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ןוֹשׁל רוּפִּס ידֵי לע רבוֹעֶשׁ ,ןיואל המּכּ ראבנ הלִּחְתִּמוּ
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Shelomo HaMelech’s words in Mishle (23:2) address this very המּכּ ךְכּ רחאו ,ןיִשֲׂע המּכּ ךְכּ רחאו ,תוּליִכרְוּ ערָה
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situation: “if you are a man of principles, you will put a knife to
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your throat,” that a person is obligated to put himself into a tenuous ןירִוּסִּא המּכּ דוֹעו ,הז ידֵי לע וֹמצע לע לבּקְַמֶּשׁ ,ןירִוּרא
situation and not commit this terrible crime. If this situation arises, .הז ידֵי לע בבּסנֶּשׁ ,םיִלוֹדגּ
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the Torah obligates us to distance ourselves from this speaker and
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not reinforce his remarks even with only a single body movement םֵשׁבּ ארֵקּי םינְפּה .םינְשִׁל וֹזּה החיִתְפּה תא קלַּחֲאו
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which could indicate approval of what he said. Regarding this
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situation, Chazal in masechet Eduyot (5 perek, 6 mishnah) have .םייַּח םיַמ רֵאְבּ םֵשׁבּ וֹל ביִבס רוּאבוּ ,םייַּחַה רוֹקְמ
said “Better a person be called a fool all of his life and not be a םימ ראבִבוּ .המדּקְהבּ יִתּבַתכּ רבכּ וּלּאה תוֹמֵשּׁל םעטו
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sinner before G-d for even one moment.” All of this applies if the
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listener knows that his reprimand will be ignored by the speaker. דוֹעו הֵשֲׂע וֹא ואל לכּ רמאנ ןפֹא הזיא לע ראֹבי םייּח VOL-1
Mekor Hachayim permits, in the laws of Esurei Lashon Hara in the 6 Kelal (in the 3
But if there is a possibility the speaker will listen to him, the listener
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.תעדּ ןנוֹחה תרַזעבּ יִלחה הזו .תוֹרחא תוֹכלה הזיא
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is obligated to reprimand him. I will explain this further, if G-d
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9 halacha).
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Be'er Mayim Chayim on page 201
L17. On occasion, another Lav will be violated (17) because of
what is common in society because of our very many sins, namely
that one speaks Lashon Hara out of a sense of anger and at that
moment of his anger he also curses this other person. He might even
curse this person with The Name, albeit in the common language of
that society. In cursing, this person will violate the absolute Lav of
(Vayikrah 19:14) “One may not curse a deaf person,” meaning that
one may not curse even if this other person is deaf and all the more
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