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%u00a9Jack Fritscher, Ph.D., All Rights ReservedHOW TO LEGALLY QUOTE FROM THIS BOOK76 Jack Fritscherwait till I ride yours. You like your new teeth? You ain%u2019t seen nothing yet. Fub your fub duck. I%u2019m gonna fuck you up.%u201d%u201cTry it,%u201d I said. %u201cYou expect me to knuckle under? To you? I mean, how do you want me to play it? Get down on my hands and knees and worship you by burning incense in your big belly?%u201d I threw the wet rag back at his face. %u201cYou found your vocation: washing light fixtures. Like father, like son. Your father washed out of Misery. What do you expect?%u201d%u201cNot what I expect, O%u2019Hara. But what you don%u2019t. This time you got me big.%u201d%u201cConfession,%u201d I said, %u201cis good for the soul.%u201d%u201cYou%u2019re supposed to confess your own sins.%u201d%u201cOh,%u201d I said, %u201cI always get that mixed up.%u201d%u201cYou%u2019re gonna get it from me in the ass when you least expect it.%u201d%u201cI think my Confessions always are about my own sins.%u201d%u201cRemember that, baby%u2014when and where you least expect it. And never mention my father again.%u201dJune 1, 1957Baiting Hank the Tank was a thrilling contest. Hank and his crowd of glee club and choir boys and opera fans had those kind of ecclesiastical ambitions that made me wonder what was God%u2019s point in such a calling of such a lewd boy with such social-climber friends who all seemed like they were having forbidden special friendships, always together, the way Father Polistina%u2014who could have caught mystical fire for all I cared%u2014never went anywhere without Father Yovan, who taught theology, and had a giant body topped with a head even so much more giant he seemed deformed, even though he was overall very handsome. As if the priesthood itself weren%u2019t elevation enough, Hank%u2019s crowd wanted to be monsignors and bishops and cardinals, and Porky had wanted to be pope.Actually, what is a vocation, but making the improbable probable?God told me I had a vocation.I told people God told me that and they all believed me.As those years in Misery%u2019s high-school department changed into four years in Misery%u2019s college department, doors opened and closed. Many boys quit. Many more boys were shipped out. The priests were shaping the next generation of clergy. Some boys like Hank the Tank began to work the church-strings that would set them up for the four last years in Misery%u2019s theology department, and then in their diocese for life.