Page 120 - The snake's pass

108 THE SNAKE'S PASS.
One thing I will say, that I never felt so much at
one with my kind ; and before going to bed I sat down
and wrote a letter of instructions to my agent, directing
him to make accurate personal inquiries all over the estate,
and at the forthcoming rent-day make such remissions of
rent as would relieve any trouble or aid in any plan of
improvements such as his kinder nature could guess at
or suggest.
I need not say that for a long time I did not sleep, and
although my thoughts were full of such hope and happi-
ness that the darkness seemed ever changing into sun-
shine, there were, at times, such harrowing thoughts of
difficulties to come, in the shape of previous attachments
—of my being late in my endeavours to win her as my
wife—of my never been able to find her again—that, now
and again, I had to jump from my bed and pace the
floor. Towards daylight I slept, and went through a
series of dreams of alternating joy and pain. At first
hope held full sway, and my sweet experience of the
day became renewed and multiplied. Again I climbed
the hill and saw her and heard her voice—again the
tearful look faded from her eyes—again I held her hand
in mine and bade good-bye, and a thousand happy
fancies filled me with exquisite joy. Then doubts began
to come. I saw her once more on the hill-top—but she
was looking out for some other than myself, and a
shadow of disappointment passed over her sweet face
when she recognized me. Again, I saw myself kneeling
at her feet and imploring her love, while only cold,