Page 62 - The Midnight Library

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On the street outside, the wind was picking up, howling through trees as

if attempting a language.
is was the life she had been in mourning for. is was the life she had
beaten herself up for not living. is was the timeline she thought she had
regretted not existing in.

‘One stupid mistake?’ she echoed.
‘Okay, two.’
It was multiplying.
‘ Two?’

‘I was in a state. You know, the pressure. Of this place. And I was ver y
drunk.’
‘You had sex with someone else and it doesn’t seem you have been seeking
much . . . atonement.’

‘Seriously, why drag all this up? We’ve been through this. Remember what
the counsellor said. About focusing on where we want to go rather than
where we have been.’
‘Do you ever think that maybe we just aren’t right for each other?’

‘What?’
‘I love you, Dan. And you can be a ver y kind person. And you were great
with my mum. And we used to – I mean, we have great conversations. But
do you ever feel that we passed where we were meant to be? at we

changed?’
She sat down on the edge of the bed. e furthest corner away from him.
‘Do you ever feel lucky to have me? Do you realise how close I was to
leaving you, two days before the wedding? Do you know how messed up you

would have been if I hadn’t turned up at the wedding?’
‘Wow. Really? You have yourself in quite high esteem there, Nora.’
‘Shouldn’t I? I mean, shouldn’t ever yone? What’s wrong with self-esteem?
And besides, it’s true. ere’s another universe where you send me

WhatsApp messages about how messed up you are without me. How you
turn to alcohol, although it seems like you turn to alcohol with me too. You
send me texts saying you miss my voice.’
He made a dismissive noise, somewhere bet ween a laugh and a grunt.

‘Well, right now, I am most definitely not missing your voice.’
She couldn’t get beyond her shoes. She found it hard – maybe impossible
– to take off another item of clothing in front of him.