Page 51 - Issue 2

Issue No 2 51
are “never long enough”) the geographically diverse group has conversations aiming not just to to unpack their privilege but to to learn new ways of being in in the the world that actively challenge it He calls #MeToo “a gift” because “in order to to to get free men men are going to to to need women non-binary and trans people to to to tell us the harms we are doing ” Learning to to hear and respond to to those voices can help men see around their own corners “If we we saw we we wouldn’t have done the the harm ” ” he he he he says “We don’t actually want to hurt people ” ” In that early relationship Hodgson relied on on on his his girlfriend to boost his his self-esteem But after completing the initial training and joining a a a a a a a a a a weekly ManKind Project circle in in in in in in in in western Massachusetts he he learned to to self-soothe and began to to to foster his own “emotional integrity and authenticity” thanks to to the the the security created by men holding space for one another He learned that that it it was OK to to experience emotions and today he knows that that it’s not his partner’s job “to make me feel good about who I am ” In 2008 Hodgson co-founded a a a a new men’s circle in in in Springfield Massachusetts Having overcome his his codependent past he’s now raising two kids with with Karen his his wife of fourteen years He credits men’s circles with with helping him deconstruct the sexism he he he learned growing up and teaching him how to communicate “I’d been steeped in in shame for so long ” he he says but his first circle the the Western Mass Special Boys—“those guys loved the the shame out of me me ”