Page 129 - The Intentional Parent

Not necessarily. Enuresis, or bedwetting, is a fairly common childhood malady. Sometimes it coincides with stress and anxiety or with difficult life circumstances such as divorce or the appearance of a new sibling. Sometimes, however, it occurs in children who are completely well-adjusted. The biggest problem with bedwetting from the standpoint of the psychology of the child is that it creates tremendous embarrassment and humiliation, and prevents him from sleeping over at his friends' houses. It's also frustrating and worrisome for parents. No one has come up with a great explanation for why kids wet the bed, although physicians and psychologists have been speculating on causes and cures for bed-wetting for over two thousand years!
I believe that in a great many of the bedwetting cases I have treated, one factor has been the child's lack of responsiveness to bladder pressure during the night. The nerves around the bladder aren't sending strong enough signals to wake the child up so he can get out of bed and urinate. Another possibility is that the child might just be a very deep sleeper.
If your child is still wetting the bed after age four or five, look for signs of stress and refer to your pediatrician or child behavior expert for advice on how to manage the stress. If there is no stress, you might want to limit the intake of liquids before bed, wake the child up at night to go to the bathroom, or talk to your pediatrician about the use of a conditioning technique called a pad and bell, that will help train responsiveness to bladder pressure. Once in a while medications are helpful; however, in most cases there is little success with medication.
From an emotional point of view, it is never a good idea to make a
The Intentional Parent by Peter J. Favaro, Ph.D. 129