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12 10 Hilariously Stupid Conspiracies
10 Hilariously Stupid
Conspiracy Theories (That
People Actually Believe)
10. The Moon Isn't Real
Sometimes boring, only slightly crazy
conspiracy theories just aren't enough for certain
people. Going above and beyond the usual 'fake
Moon landings' proposition, there is a small
group of people that's totally convinced the
entire Moon is a fabrication. The general theory
appears to be that there is something behind the
'Moon', but what we see is actually just a giant
hologram.
The proposed reasoning behind this
giant Truman Show-esque illusion doesn't seem
to have been formulated yet, but apparently it's
powered by a massive electrical system. This
theory doesn't even make much of an attempt to
explain when this hologram came about, or if
there ever was a real moon.
people that believe yoga is actually an evil Karen Douglas, a University of Kent
9. Dinosaurs Helped Build The practice designed to trick people into psychologist, along with a student, published
Pyramids worshipping Satan. research in which they exposed people to
The pyramids have long been the subject Rather than being simply a good way to conspiracy theories about climate change and
relax and exercise, these people interpret the the death of Princess Diana. Those who got
of a wild variety of conspiracy theories, but this
practice as being a way of opening people up to information supporting the theories but not
one really takes the biscuit. A school in Malta,
named the Accelerated Christian Academy, has a Satanic possession. Sure, yoga and its information debunking them were more likely to
director that believes the dinosaurs were not practitioners can be a bit odd sometimes, but to withdraw from participation in politics and were
only alive at the same time as humans, but also say that they're all devil worshippers seems a bit less likely to take action to reduce their carbon
gave the Egyptians a hand (or claw) in building harsh. footprints.
the pyramids. Still, the internet is filled with 'horror Alex Jones, a syndicated radio host, can
Speaking of the theory, director of the stories' of people claiming they narrowly build fame as a conspiracy peddler; politicians
institution Vince Fenech states quite clearly, "Of escaped the evil clutches of a yoga class, and can hint at conspiracies for votes and leverage;
how they found redemption only after but if conspiracy theories are a tool the average
course the dinosaurs existed. It is mentioned in
denouncing yoga and embracing Jesus. Sounds person uses to reclaim his sense of agency and
the Book of Job. They were used to help build
the pyramids". Fortunately, Fenech claims that perfectly rational. access to democracy, it’s an ineffective tool. It
this particular theory isn't taught at his school, can even have dangerous health implications.
and it's only a "personal belief" of his. He does, 6. Obama Could Control The Weather For example, research has shown that African-
however, teach that the universe is only 6,000 When Obama was under pressure over Americans who believe AIDS is a weapon
years old, so it's probably best not to send your the IRS scandal and Benghazi, his loosed on them by the government
child over to the institution just yet. administration had a clever trick up its sleeve. (remembering the abuses of the Tuskegee
To alleviate the heat, they used their top secret experiment) are less likely to practice protected
8. The US Government Dumped Fake Snow weather machine to create a tornado that sex. And if you believe that governments or
On Georgia devastated Oklahoma and destroyed the town of corporations are hiding evidence that vaccines
There can be many reasons behind some Moore. Or, at least, that's what a certain group of harm children, you’re less likely to have your
of the more insane conspiracy theories, from conspiracy theorists want you to believe. children vaccinated. The result: pockets of
paranoia to possible mental illness. Occasionally The idea is that the Obama measles and whooping-cough infections and a
though, it just boils down to a total lack of administration uses their weather machine to few deaths in places with low child-vaccination
understanding basic science. Late last year, a distract from certain political scandals and other rates.
rare occurrence happened in and around Atlanta, happenings that they aren't happen with. The Psychologists aren’t sure whether
Georgia. It snowed. Of course, this isn't same conspiracy tends to crop up every time powerlessness causes conspiracy theories or
conspiracy theory material in itself. there's a natural disaster. Hurricane Isaac? vice versa. Either way, the current scientific
At some point, one Georgian genius Obama messing about with the Republicans thinking suggests these beliefs are nothing more
decided to try and melt a fistful of snow with a using his weather machine. than an extreme form of cynicism, a turning
butane lighter and found that, rather than turning Hurricane Sandy? Obama making away from politics and traditional media —
into a puddle of water, it blackened and filled himself look a hero using his weather machine. which only perpetuates the problem. []
their nostrils with a plastic smell. This triggered It all makes perfect sense.
a mass of videos posted online of people doing
the same thing, provoking people to conclude (Continues on Page 24)
that the snow was fake and possibly poisonous.
As more astute readers will have already Why Rational People Buy
figured out, the snow was melting, but only
appears not to because a direct flame turns it into Into Conspiracy Theories
slush. The blackening is just soot, and the plastic
smell? The fumes from the lighter. Brilliant.
Continued from Page 11
7. Yoga Is A Form Of Satanic Worship
And that’s a problem. Because while
If there were a list of controversial topics
believing George W. Bush helped plan the Sept.
for discussion, you might not expect yoga to be
11 attacks might make you feel in control, it
one of them. Regardless, there are a number of
doesn’t actually make you so. Earlier this year,