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Divorce and Remarriage 395

Grandchildren of Divorce

Paul Amato and Jacob Cheadle (2005), the first sociologists to study the grandchil-
dren of couples who had divorced, found that the effects of divorce continue across
generations. Using a national sample, they compared grandchildren—those whose
grandparents had divorced with those whose grandparents had not divorced. Their
findings are astounding. The grandchildren of divorce have weaker ties to their par-
ents, don’t go as far in school, and don’t get along as well with their spouses. As
these researchers put it, when parents divorce, the consequences ripple through the
lives of children who are not yet born.

Fathers’ Contact with Children after Divorce TABLE 12.3 Fathers’ Contact with
With most children living with their mothers after divorce, how Their Children after Divorce
often do fathers see their children? As you can see from Table 12.3,
researchers have found four main patterns. The most common pattern Frequent 1 Minimal 2 Decrease 3 Increase 4
is for fathers to see their children frequently after the divorce, and to 38% 32% 23% 8%
keep doing so. But as you can see, a similar number of fathers have
1 Maintains contact once a week or more through the
little contact with their children both right after the divorce and in the years.
following years. 2 Little contact after the divorce, maybe 2 to 6 times a
Which fathers are more likely to see and talk often to their children? year.
It is men who were married to the mothers of the children, especially 3 Has frequent contact after the divorce but decreases it
those who are older, more educated, and have higher incomes. In con- through the years.
trast, men who were cohabiting with the mothers, as well as younger, 4 Has little contact after the divorce but increases it
less educated men with lower incomes, tend to have less contact with through the years. Sometimes called the “divorce acti-
their children. If his former wife marries, the father tends to see his chil- vated” father.
dren less (Berger et al. 2012). Source: By the author: Based on Cheadle et al. 2010.

The Ex-Spouses
Anger, depression, and anxiety are common feelings at divorce. But so is relief. Women
are more likely than men to feel that divorce is giving them a “new chance” in life. A few FIGURE 12.16 The
couples manage to remain friends through it all—but they are the exception. The spouse
who initiates the divorce usually gets over it sooner (Kelly 1992; Wang and Amato Marital History of U.S.
2000) and remarries sooner (Sweeney 2002). Brides and Grooms
Divorce does not necessarily mean the end of a couple’s relationship. Many divorced
couples maintain contact because of their children. For others, the continuities, as soci- 60%
ologists call them, represent lingering attachments (Vaughan 1985; Masheter 1991; 54
author’s file 2005). The former husband may help his former wife paint a room or move 50%
furniture; she may invite him over for a meal or to watch television. They might even 40%
go to dinner or to see a movie together. Some couples even continue to make love after
they divorce. Percentage 30% 23
20%
Remarriage 10% 11 11

Remarriage is now so common that one-fourth (24 percent) of married couples are
0%
on their second (or more) marriage (Elliott and Lewis 2010). As you can see in Figure
12.16, divorced people are as likely to marry other divorced people as someone who has First marriage of
not been married before. How do remarriages work out? The divorce rate of remarried bride and groom
people without children is the same as that of first marriages. For those who bring chil- Remarriage of bride
dren into a new marriage, however, marriage and family life are more complicated and and groom
stressful, and these couples are more likely to divorce (MacDonald and DeMaris 1995). First marriage of bride,
remarriage of groom
A lack of clear norms may also undermine these marriages (Coleman et al. 2000). As
sociologist Andrew Cherlin (1989) noted, we lack satisfactory names for stepmothers, First marriage of groom,
remarriage of bride
stepfathers, stepbrothers, stepsisters, stepaunts, stepuncles, stepcousins, and stepgrand-
Source: By the author. Based on Statistical
parents. Not only are these awkward terms to use, but they also represent ill-defined Abstract of the United States 2000:
relationships. Table 145. Table dropped in later editions.