Page 126 - The Circle of Life

Chapter 5

Divorce

If you thought that the law takes marriage seriously then you can imagine what

it does to divorce but ironically the actual legal process is very simple. However,

getting divorced is never pleasant. When I was still young and idealistic I would
caution clients to try again and not to rush into a divorce which also caused a
few dark looks. I still say that but I also recognise that sometimes divorce is the

best solution if not the only solution. Some couples are just not meant to be and

destroy each other piece by piece. That story of staying on for the children is
rubbish and cr-p in law. The law knows this and thus divorce proceedings are

fairly straightforward and cheap if you settle the matter amicably. It is really not
rocket science.

I have a theory on love which I may have explained before and that is that soul
mates will hunt for each other and ultimately find each other. And there is

absolutely nothing you can do when that happens for your spouse will leave you
and you should be big enough to accept this. It also gives you a chance to find

your soul mate without being bound to a non-soul mate. It will never work out if
you are not soul mates whether you want it to work or not. There is no shame in

that and perhaps in the wider scheme of things the children needed to be made
(if I can use such a word) and now it is time to move on.

I know I sound cynical and no doubt the years made me more cynical than most

but I am not cynical on love. You are either genuinely happy or you are not. The
average way is not good enough if you want to survive the years together.

Statistics tells us it takes 3 years and 4 months before a couple prefers the
television above sex. Or forget to kiss you goodnight. These are big warning

signs and used to be known as the seven year itch. Probably with the Internet
and better communications the temptations grew too much.

We have a desire, probably because of the way we grew up, to rescue everyone

and everything including our marriages. It may shock you but I think at times
that is not what God wanted. Please allow me to be religious for a few sentences
and explain with a story which a client told me: "He was a rich man driving

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