Page 43 - the-portrait-of-a-lady
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customed indeed to keep it behind bolts; and at important
         moments, when she would have been thankful to make use
         of her judgement alone, she paid the penalty of having given
         undue encouragement to the faculty of seeing without judg-
         ing. At present, with her sense that the note of change had
         been struck, came gradually a host of images of the things
         she was leaving behind her. The years and hours of her life
         came back to her, and for a long time, in a stillness broken
         only by the ticking of the big bronze clock, she passed them
         in review. It had been a very happy life and she had been a
         very fortunate person—this was the truth that seemed to
         emerge most vividly. She had had the best of everything,
         and in a world in which the circumstances of so many peo-
         ple made them unenviable it was an advantage never to have
         known anything particularly unpleasant. It appeared to Is-
         abel that the unpleasant had been even too absent from her
         knowledge,  for  she  had  gathered  from  her  acquaintance
         with literature that it was often a source of interest and even
         of instruction. Her father had kept it away from her—her
         handsome,  much-loved  father,  who  always  had  such  an
         aversion to it. It was a great felicity to have been his daugh-
         ter;  Isabel  rose  even  to  pride  in  her  parentage.  Since  his
         death she had seemed to see him as turning his braver side
         to his children and as not having managed to ignore the
         ugly quite so much in practice as in aspiration. But this only
         made her tenderness for him greater; it was scarcely even
         painful to have to suppose him too generous, too good-na-
         tured,  too  indifferent  to  sordid  considerations.  Many
         persons had held that he carried this indifference too far,

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