Page 73 - the-portrait-of-a-lady
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her that she thought too much about herself; you could have
         made her colour, any day in the year, by calling her a rank
         egoist. She was always planning out her development, desir-
         ing her perfection, observing her progress. Her nature had,
         in her conceit, a certain garden-like quality, a suggestion
         of perfume and murmuring boughs, of shady bowers and
         lengthening vistas, which made her feel that introspection
         was, after all, an exercise in the open air, and that a visit to
         the recesses of one’s spirit was harmless when one returned
         from it with a lapful of roses. But she was often reminded
         that there were other gardens in the world than those of her
         remarkable soul, and that there were moreover a great many
         places which were not gardens at allonly dusky pestiferous
         tracts, planted thick with ugliness and misery. In the cur-
         rent of that repaid episode on curiosity on which she had
         lately been floating, which had conveyed her to this beauti-
         ful old England and might carry her much further still, she
         often checked herself with the thought of the thousands of
         people who were less happy than herself—a thought which
         for the moment made her fine, full consciousness appear a
         kind of immodesty. What should one do with the misery
         of the world in a scheme of the agreeable for one’s self? It
         must be confessed that this question never held her long.
         She was too young, too impatient to live, too unacquainted
         with pain. She always returned to her theory that a young
         woman whom after all every one thought clever should be-
         gin by getting a general impression of life. This impression
         was necessary to prevent mistakes, and after it should be se-
         cured she might make the unfortunate condition of others

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