Page 564 - sons-and-lovers

hated her, and was driven to her in spite of himself. He went
mostly into the company of men, was always at the George
or the White Horse. His mother was ill, distant, quiet, shad-
owy. He was terrified of something; he dared not look at
her. Her eyes seemed to grow darker, her face more waxen;
still she dragged about at her work.
At Whitsuntide he said he would go to Blackpool for four
days with his friend Newton. The latter was a big, jolly fel-
low, with a touch of the bounder about him. Paul said his
mother must go to Sheffield to stay a week with Annie, who
lived there. Perhaps the change would do her good. Mrs.
Morel was attending a woman’s doctor in Nottingham. He
said her heart and her digestion were wrong. She consented
to go to Sheffield, though she did not want to; but now she
would do everything her son wished of her. Paul said he
would come for her on the fifth day, and stay also in Shef-
field till the holiday was up. It was agreed.
The two young men set off gaily for Blackpool. Mrs. Mo-
rel was quite lively as Paul kissed her and left her. Once at the
station, he forgot everything. Four days were clear—not an
anxiety, not a thought. The two young men simply enjoyed
themselves. Paul was like another man. None of himself re-
mained—no Clara, no Miriam, no mother that fretted him.
He wrote to them all, and long letters to his mother; but
they were jolly letters that made her laugh. He was having
a good time, as young fellows will in a place like Blackpool.
And underneath it all was a shadow for her.
Paul was very gay, excited at the thought of staying with
his mother in Sheffield. Newton was to spend the day with