Page 180 - erewhon

his service hereafter. And so the formula continues, going
sometimes into very minute details, according to the fan-
cies of family lawyers, who will not make it any shorter than
they can help.
The deed being thus prepared, on the third or fourth day
after the birth of the child, or as they call it, the ‘final im-
portunity,’ the friends gather together, and there is a feast
held, where they are all very melancholy—as a general rule,
I believe, quite truly so—and make presents to the father
and mother of the child in order to console them for the in-
jury which has just been done them by the unborn.
By-and-by the child himself is brought down by his
nurse, and the company begin to rail upon him, upbraiding
him for his impertinence, and asking him what amends he
proposes to make for the wrong that he has committed, and
how he can look for care and nourishment from those who
have perhaps already been injured by the unborn on some
ten or twelve occasions; for they say of people with large
families, that they have suffered terrible injuries from the
unborn; till at last, when this has been carried far enough,
some one suggests the formula, which is brought out and
solemnly read to the child by the family straightener. This
gentleman is always invited on these occasions, for the very
fact of intrusion into a peaceful family shows a depravity
on the part of the child which requires his professional ser-
vices.
On being teased by the reading and tweaked by the
nurse, the child will commonly begin to cry, which is reck-
oned a good sign, as showing a consciousness of guilt. He is

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