Page 206 - erewhon
P. 206
I was not mistaken in her; she said that she believed I
loved her as much as she loved me, and that she would brave
anything if I could only assure her that what I proposed
would not be thought dishonourable in England; she could
not live without me, and would rather die with me than
alone; that death was perhaps the best for us both; that I
must plan, and that when the hour came I was to send for
her, and trust her not to fail me; and so after many tears and
embraces, we tore ourselves away.
I then left the Nosnibors, took a lodging in the town, and
became melancholy to my heart’s content. Arowhena and I
used to see each other sometimes, for I had taken to going
regularly to the Musical Banks, but Mrs. Nosnibor and Zu-
lora both treated me with considerable coldness. I felt sure
that they suspected me. Arowhena looked miserable, and
I saw that her purse was now always as full as she could
fill it with the Musical Bank money—much fuller than of
old. Then the horrible thought occurred to me that her
health might break down, and that she might be subjected
to a criminal prosecution. Oh! how I hated Erewhon at that
time.
I was still received at court, but my good looks were be-
ginning to fail me, and I was not such an adept at concealing
the effects of pain as the Erewhonians are. I could see that
my friends began to look concerned about me, and was
obliged to take a leaf out of Mahaina’s book, and pretend
to have developed a taste for drinking. I even consulted a
straightener as though this were so, and submitted to much
discomfort. This made matters better for a time, but I could
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