Page 54 - San Diego Woman Magazine

Rachel is a licensed therapist
and co-founder of Viva, a
multi-city mental health &
wellness practice. She believes What if
that wellness looks different
on everyone and is dedicated
to Viva's mission of making There Really
therapy more accessible and
individualized. A four time
marathon finisher and five Isn’t Time
time black belt in martial arts
despite managing a chronic
illness, she strongly believes in By Rachel Gersten
a holistic approach to mental
health and healthcare in
general.

s soon as we hit adulthood,
we begin realizing that there
Awill never be enough time
to do all the things we need or want
to do. Since no one’s been able to
figure out how to add more hours
to the day, advice on how to manage
this time crunch is everywhere.
As a therapist, there’s a phrase I
cringe every time I hear: ”You just
have to make the time.”
We all hear those words often, want. If you're not, see what you
and all they do is add anxiety to our can shift around. You might dis-
plate. We are already trying to make cover inefficiencies with your time,
the time to meditate, exercise, meal and create space to attend that new
prep, see friends, take the kids to workout class or to just sit down
school, and clean the house. How with a book.
can we possibly add yet another However, that’s not always the
friend dinner to our schedule? case. There are situations in which
So when someone smugly re- you truthfully don’t have the time.
plies ,“You just have to make the If you’re already feeling incredibly
time,” it makes you think as if you’re overwhelmed with work, caring for
wasting your time on something family, being a good friend, spend-
frivolous and need to adjust your ing time with your partner, and/or
priorities. maintaining the household - you’re
While that is often a case, we probably going to want to scream
should still go through the process if someone tells you to just drop
of evaluating where we are spending something from your schedule in
our time. In certain situations, we order to do something else. filling your days needs to stay, don't sions that fit your lifestyle. If you’re
can readjust and create more space What part of that schedule worry about it. You don't need to do looking for a great option, Viva re-
for the things we want. In other should be dropped? Free time is a more. cently started seeing clients in San
cases, we may realize we are already privilege, one that unfortunately not Finding time to do everything Diego and throughout the state of
doing enough and it’s okay not to everyone is lucky enough to spare. under the sun is an unrealistic and California. We offer flexible sched-
make the time for something else. It’s not always as simple, or possible, unachievable expectation. It’s okay uling and tailor therapy to you
Sometimes we can make small as “just make time for you”. to not squeeze in everything. based on whatever your life looks
changes like limiting binge-watch- You can't always make the time. If you’re struggling with this like at the moment.
ing a show or spending less time And you know what? That's (aren’t we all?), talking to a thera- Bottom line: If there isn't time,
scrolling social media. I’ve been okay. You don't have to do every- pist can help. I know we just talked that's okay. If that friend you’re try-
guilty of feeling rushed in the morn- thing, and you can’t even if you about not adding anything else to ing to hang out with says they don't
ing as a result of texting with one want to. There isn't time to do ev- your already full days. If you can’t, have the time, listen to them. Don't
hand and applying make-up with erything. If you feel like you're you can’t. However, taking an hour question them. Help if it’s appropri-
the other rather than just putting drowning, or just getting by, with for therapy can be one of the most ate, but otherwise, take their word
the phone down. what you've already committed to, beneficial adjustments you can they're doing the best they can. Un-
There's nothing wrong with don't commit to more. It’s impos- make. less, of course, you've figured out
re-evaluating your routine and pri- sible and unsustainable to do it all. Therapy doesn’t have to drain the secret to making our days 27
orities. Think about whether you’re After evaluating your time, if your schedule. A good therapist hours long. If you have, please share
spending your time the ways you you find that everything currently works with you in scheduling ses- the secret with us.
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