Page 54 - San Diego Woman Magazine
P. 54

Rachel is a licensed therapist
        and co-founder of Viva, a
        multi-city mental health &
        wellness practice. She believes   What if
        that wellness looks different
        on everyone and is dedicated
        to Viva's mission of making   There Really
        therapy more accessible and
        individualized. A four time
        marathon finisher and five    Isn’t Time
        time black belt in martial arts
        despite managing a chronic
        illness, she strongly believes in   By Rachel Gersten
        a holistic approach to mental
        health and healthcare in

             s soon as we hit adulthood,
             we begin realizing that there
        Awill never be enough time
        to do all the things we need or want
        to do. Since no one’s been able to
        figure out how to add more hours
        to the day, advice on how to manage
        this time crunch is everywhere.
           As a therapist, there’s a phrase I
        cringe every time I hear: ”You just
        have to make the time.”
           We all hear those words often,   want. If you're not, see what you
        and all they do is add anxiety to our   can shift around. You might dis-
        plate. We are already trying to make   cover inefficiencies with your time,
        the time to meditate, exercise, meal   and create space to attend that new
        prep, see friends, take the kids to   workout class or to just sit down
        school,  and  clean  the  house.  How   with a book.
        can we possibly add yet another   However, that’s not always the
        friend dinner to our schedule?  case. There are situations in which
           So when someone smugly re-  you truthfully don’t have the time.
        plies ,“You just have to make  the   If you’re already feeling incredibly
        time,” it makes you think as if you’re   overwhelmed with work, caring for
        wasting your time on something   family, being a good friend, spend-
        frivolous  and  need  to  adjust  your   ing time with your partner, and/or
        priorities.                maintaining the household - you’re
           While that is often a case, we   probably going to want to scream
        should still go through the process   if someone tells you to just drop
        of evaluating where we are spending   something from your schedule in
        our time. In certain situations, we   order to do something else.  filling your days needs to stay, don't   sions that fit your lifestyle. If you’re
        can readjust and create more space   What part of that schedule   worry about it. You don't need to do   looking for a great option, Viva re-
        for the things we want. In other   should be dropped? Free time is a   more.      cently started seeing clients in San
        cases, we may realize we are already   privilege, one that unfortunately not   Finding time to do everything   Diego and throughout the state of
        doing enough and it’s okay not to   everyone is lucky enough to spare.   under the sun is an unrealistic and   California. We offer flexible sched-
        make the time for something else.   It’s not always as simple, or possible,   unachievable expectation. It’s okay   uling and tailor therapy to you
           Sometimes we can make small   as “just make time for you”.   to not squeeze in everything.   based on whatever your life looks
        changes like limiting binge-watch-  You can't always make the time.  If you’re struggling with this   like at the moment.
        ing  a show or  spending less  time   And you know what? That's   (aren’t we all?), talking to a thera-  Bottom line: If there isn't time,
        scrolling social media. I’ve been   okay. You don't have to do every-  pist can help. I know we just talked   that's okay. If that friend you’re try-
        guilty of feeling rushed in the morn-  thing, and you can’t even if you   about not adding anything else to   ing to hang out with says they don't
        ing as a result of texting with one   want to. There isn't time to do ev-  your already full days. If you can’t,   have the time, listen to them. Don't
        hand and applying make-up with   erything.  If  you  feel  like  you're   you can’t. However, taking an hour   question them. Help if it’s appropri-
        the other rather than just putting   drowning, or just getting by, with   for therapy can be one of the most   ate, but otherwise, take their word
        the phone down.            what you've already committed to,   beneficial adjustments you can   they're doing the best they can. Un-
           There's nothing wrong with   don't commit to more. It’s impos-  make.          less, of course, you've figured out
        re-evaluating your routine and pri-  sible and unsustainable to do it all.   Therapy doesn’t have to drain   the secret to making our days 27
        orities. Think about whether you’re   After evaluating your time, if   your schedule. A good therapist   hours long. If you have, please share
        spending your time the ways you   you find that everything currently   works with you in scheduling ses-  the secret with us.
        54 54
   49   50   51   52   53   54   55   56   57   58   59