Page 79 - Javanan Magazine Issue # 1867

From The Desk Of The Editor ISSUE No. 1866
JAVANAN
The children asked: to our family center again. Now I
WILL YOU FORGIVE wanted with all my heart to watch

my children fly. At this time, I was
THE FATHER?! facing a good-hearted suitor with
good personality, an authentic and
dignified person, someone who ac-
cording to himself, witnessed my
said, “ I have bought 8 years of motherly and responsible
you a house, provided efforts and now, wants to travel the
you with comfortable rest of the way with me in an aura of
things and everything love and imaginary comfort.
is ready for your con- Last week, while I was fly-
hen I saw my husband venience, what else ing on the clouds with the sound
Massoud at Los Angles do you want? In this of my children’s laughter, my little
Wairport after 6 years of be- land, an 18 -year daughter opened the door with the
ing away, contrary to that constant -old girl becomes sound of the doorbell. Then she said
affection and love and those kind your servant if you that an old and disturbed man was
eyes, it was as if I had met a stranger. only feed her. As standing in front of the door, who
Massoud did not even hug long as I am still wanted to see me. I rushed out and
the children as usual, and all his ac- by your side and saw Massoud in a broken, crushed
tions, words and behavior were cold providing your life and humble form. He said hoarsely
and artificial. He put the luggage in and don’t close my that he came to meet the children
his big car and sat behind the wheel eyes on you, de- and needed my help. Despite my
and started driving. In the middle spite all the temp- inner desire, I brought him inside
of the way, instead of talking to the tation that is here, the house. He told me that the two
children who were full of love and be grateful, thank young Spanish who were his em-
excitement because of their father’s God and don’t ployees took him to the court on
presence, he was talking to one or say anything.” charges of sexual abuse, and all his
two ladies on his cell phone in Span- After all life, from the factory to the store and
ish. Among his words, according to these encoun- home, and even his savings, all have
the information I already had, I no- ters, indiffer- been lost in this way. He said that he
ticed some words like love, longing, ences, cold- lived in a small Mexican restaurant
and promise of meeting, but I tried ness, and after in a remote neighborhood. He also
to look at it in a positive way, that’s room many conflicts and unexpected said that he has come to ask for for-
why I scolded myself not to look for of the store and joking and insults and pain that had happened giveness and see his children too. At
any trouble. saying romantic words in Spanish. to my 4 children, I finally separated that time my heart was broken. I felt
Massoud took us inside the He didn’t see me anymore. He was from Massoud 7 years ago. As he very sad for him. I don’t know why
beautiful house that he had bought 4 indifferent to my presence, even had previously hidden his financial I wasn’t happy with all this misery
years ago and put our luggage in a my tears did not bring his heart to documents, the children and I parted and poverty. Reluctantly and only
room. Then he took me to the kitch- mercy. with him with little savings, which with my begging gesture, the chil-
en and showed me the refrigerator. I asked him, “Where is my did not even last a year. My two dren surrounded him and talked to
After that he said, “Everything is Massoud? Where is the man who daughters, who were about 13 and him a little.
ready for you, you don’t need me was full of love and purity for his 15 years old, worked as babysitters Yesterday, when we rented
anymore, I am very busy, I have wife and children? Where is the man and night teachers. I myself in ad- a small apartment for him and put his
to go downtown, if I am not at my who could not bear a drop of my dition to a part-time daily job, used furniture there, we made an arrange-
work, everything will fall apart.” to distribute American newspapers ment so that he would get a short
The children and I, who tears? Where is my husband who early in the morning with my two monthly payment from us. While
were confused by Massoud’s cold never left my kitchen pot empty of 9– and 11– year-old sons, and in this leaving that old house that was
and indifferent attitude, stood mo- flowers? And where is the man who way, we built a life with great effort rented for him, my eldest daughter
tionless in front of the door and did not eat anything without me and but pride. Finally, my elder daugh- asked, did you forgive him?
watched him move away. I could not didnt sleep without my breath? ter, who had finished her university I raised my head to the sky
believe that Massoud, who was full He said calmly, “The world education, started a lucrative job, and said, “The one who is above
of love and purity towards his chil- has changed. I work day and night, and my other daughter got a job in a should forgive him, the one who
dren, had turned into such a creature. so I have to take care of myself, big company. My two sons worked shows his strength in any situa-
Two months later, when I the law of this land says that if you part-time while studying, and I also tion, the one who brings them up
went to his workplace, which was a don’t enjoy the moments of your life became a part-time nurse for an old and down.” As always, the children
big factory full of clothes and dress- and close your eyes to your desires, rich man. With hard work and great hugged me and kissed my face, so I
es, I faced new bitter realities. I saw you will grow old and perish. I lost effort, 8 months ago, we bought a was again overwhelmed with happi-
him lying on a sofa while a young all my life in Iran, I lost here in the beautiful house, which was more ness and I was flying on the clouds
Spanish girl was just massaging his early years, now I have to think for beautiful and bigger than Massoud’s that I have been flying with the love
legs in warm water. I saw him having myself before its too late.” house. They placed everything they of my children for many years.
lunch with a young girl in the back I said, “What about us?” He liked in that house. Peace returned Translation: Massi Zokaei
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