Page 35 - C:\Users\Owner\Documents\Flip PDF Professional\Ellin Dize proof book\
P. 35
Continued from previous page
Labeling. An extreme form of #1 above. "Instead of saying 'I made a mistake,' you attach
a negative label to yourself: 'I'm a loser.'... Labeling is quite irrational because you are not
the same as what you do. Human beings exist, but 'fools', 'losers', and 'jerks' do not.
These labels are just useless abstractions that lead to anger, anxiety, frustration, and low
self-esteem. You may also label others..."
'Should' Statements. "You tell yourself that things should be the way you hoped or
expected them to be... 'Musts', 'oughts', and 'have tos' are similar... "Should Statements"
that are directed against yourself lead to guilt and frustration. Should statements that are
directed against other people or the world in general lead to anger and frustration... Many
people try to motivate themselves with shoulds and shouldn'ts, as if they were
delinquents who had to be punished... all these shoulds and musts make you feel
rebellious and you get the urge to do just the opposite... Dr. Albert Ellis has called this
'musterbation'."
Personalization and blame. "Personalization occurs when you hold yourself personally
responsible for an event that isn't entirely under your control... leads to guilt, shame and
feelings of inadequacy. Some people do the opposite, They blame other people for their
problems, and they overlook ways that they might be contributing to the problem... other
people will resent being scapegoated and they will just toss the blame right back... It's
like the game of hot potato-- no one wants to get stuck with it."
I know, I know, some of you are going to find all of this to be mind-numbingly obvious.
But someone who practices many or even all of these forms of thinking (and it's easy to
see how some of them can overlap with each other to form a near-unbreakable downward
spiral of negative thought) on a frequent basis may not be aware that e is doing any of it.
To realize that each and every one of these patterns functions to distort one's personal
reality in unhealthful ways is the first step towards letting go of the negativity that you
may or may not realize is holding you back.
Ereneta has since informed me via /msg that the author of this book is David D.
Burns, . This is the part of the writeup where I give him credit for his work. Well done,
Burns.

