Page 199 - HBR Leader's Handbook: Make an Impact, Inspire Your Organization, and Get to the Next Level

188 HBR Leader’s Handbook

Did you stop and draw a picture or chart for everyone that suddenly made
your argument clear? Did you stage a debate of opposing views before
making a good decision?
Once you’ve identified patterns of actions that made you excel, ask your-
self how you can perform those actions more regularly and deliberately.

WHEN AM I LEAST EFFECTIVE? Inquire also about the opposite case: in
leading others, when did I behave in a way that was counterproductive?
What stylistic manner or habits do I practice that may put people off, slow
progress in a team, or lessen trust for our organization?
You may have to press people to be candid, as you ask them to take on
the uncomfortable task of giving you negative feedback. Here again, a
third-party-administered survey or set of interviews is sometimes needed
to surface the hard truths. But there is often more learning for leaders on
this side of the coin, so don’t shy away from the opportunity. The feedback
you get should prompt your own reflection about your patterns of action
and how you can modify them to become more effective.

HOW WELL DO I HANDLE RELATIONSHIPS? Asking about your style and
habits of dealing with people is worth its own separate question, even if the
topic has already come up in your self-inquiry. Interpersonal relationships
are such a large part of leadership that there’s value in gaining whatever
additional detail you can discover.
In recent years, research on leadership has increasingly highlighted
the importance of emotional intelligence in leadership, which we talked
about in chapter 3 in reference to building a team. Emotional intelligence,
however, also applies to you; it is a major aspect of effective relationship
management as first detailed in Daniel Goleman’s HBR article “What
Makes a Leader?” As you probe others to understand how well you handle
relationships, ask about Goleman’s component themes: Am I self-aware in
a way to understand how my behavior affects others? Do I self-regulate im-
pulses and emotions that are disruptive? How well do I inspire others? Do
I bring empathy to bear to understand other people’s emotional makeup?