Page 161 - Bridget Jones's Diary - by Helen FIELDING

again.

10.25 p.m. Have got new cassette in now. Right. Turn to 'Recording'.

'Recording will start when in Tuner Mode when any button is pressed (apart
from Mem).'What, though, is Tuner Mode? 'When recording from a camcorder
or similar press AV prog source 3 x during a bilingual transmission press 1/2 and
hold for 3 seconds to make your choice of language.'

Oh God. Stupid manual reminds me of Linguistics professor had at Bangor,
who was so immersed in finer points of language that could not speak without
veering off into analysis of each individual word: 'This morning I would . . . now
"would" you see, in 1570 . . . '

Aargh aargh. Newsnight is starting.

10.31 p.m. OK. OK. Calm. Penny Husbands-Bosworth's asbestos leukaemia
item is not on yet.

10.33 p. Yesss, yesss. RECORDING CURRENT PROGRAMME. Have done
it!

Aaargh. All going mad. Cassette has started rewinding and now stopped and
ejected. Why? Shit. Shit. Realize in excitement have sat on remote control.

10.35 p.m. Frantic now. Have rung Shazzer, Rebecca, Simon, Magda. Nobody

knows how to programme their videos. Only person I know who knows how to