Page 255 - The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts

relationship. We come with different expectations, different
ways of approaching things, and different opinions about
what matters in life. In a healthy marriage, that variety of
perspectives must be processed. We need not agree on
everything, but we must find a way to handle our differences
so that they do not become divisive. With empty love tanks,
couples tend to argue and withdraw, and some may tend to
be violent verbally or physically in their arguments. But when
the love tank is full, we create a climate of friendliness, a
climate that seeks to understand, that is willing to allow
differences and to negotiate problems. I am convinced that
no single area of marriage affects the rest of marriage as
much as meeting the emotional need for love.
The ability to love, especially when your spouse is not
loving you, may seem impossible for some. Such love may
require us to draw upon our spiritual resources. A number
of years ago, as I faced my own marital struggles, I
rediscovered my need for God. As an anthropologist, I had
been trained to examine data. I decided to personally
excavate the roots of the Christian faith. Examining the
historical accounts of Christ’s birth, life, death, and
resurrection, I came to view His death as an expression of
love and His resurrection as profound evidence of His
power. I became a true “believer.” I committed my life to
Him and have found that He provides the inner spiritual
energy to love, even when love is not reciprocated. I would
encourage you to make your own investigation of the one
whom, as He died, prayed for those who killed Him: