Page 996 - Total War on PTSD

CHAPTER 31 - THE DOG PICKS YOU
Satellite and Rocky the Blue Heelers and Millie the German Shepherd - Steve: I served in the U.S. Marine Corps in San Diego, CA (Camp Pendleton) for four months 11 days. The military structure as a teenager gave me work habits and the ability to work as a team. I have a deep love for my country. I am willing to die to protect it. I would support my son serving in the military because it would allow him to grow to be a better man. If I hadn't been hurt, I would have stayed in and likely would have retired from service. That was my intention. I bounced around a lot job wise afterwards. I had a lot of problems after...for maybe the next year or so. I think I stayed drunk more than I did anything. Then I went to work for the Post Office for a while but that only lasted 89 days. I was dating the Postmasters daughter and when we broke up, I got fired. It was on the last day of my probation period. After that I worked construction for a number of years...and lived in Nevada at the time.
I think my PTSD really started bothering me more in February of 1993. It was after four more surgeries and I started having anxiety attacks, panic attacks, high anxiety, depression...just pretty much everything. I didn't really get diagnosed until maybe 2008. At that point I had already had around 21 surgeries. I have had 33 total surgeries to date, with 28 of those being knee surgeries. My mental health physician wrote it all in her notes. My stressor is any hospital or medical facility basically. It's a little bit better now because it's controlled with medication but I am still bothered by going to those places. It takes them forever just to get my blood pressure to an acceptable level (not too high) after I walk into the VA for an appointment. They'll usually have to take it five or six times until I can relax enough. They also usually have to leave the door open so that I don't feel confined...so I can see outside the room.
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