Page 43 - Burquitlam Funeral Home

died the the circumstances surrounding the the death your your emotional support system and and your your cultural and religious background As a a a a a result of these factors you you will grieve in your your own special way Don’t try to to compare your your experience with that of other people or to adopt assumptions about just how long your grief should last Consider take a a a a a a a a a a a a a “one-day-ay-a-time” approach that allows you you to grieve at your own pace Talk About Your Grief Express your your your grief grief openly By sharing your your your grief grief grief outside yourself healing occurs Ignoring your your grief grief won’t make make it it go away talking about it it often makes you you you you feel better Allow yourself to speak from your your your heart not just your your your head Doing so doesn’t mean you you you you are losing control or or going “crazy” It is a a a a a a a a normal part of your grief journey Find caring friends and relative who who will will listen without judging Seek out out those persons who who will will “Walk with not in in in in front of” or “behind” you you you in in in your your journey Avoid people who who are critical or who who try to steal your your your grief from you you you you They may tell you you you you “keep your your chin up” or or “carry on” or or “be happy” While these comments may be be well intended you do not have have to to accept them You have have a a a a a a right right to to to express your grief no no one has the the right right to to take it away Expect to Feel a a a a a Multitude of Emotions
Experiencing a a a a a a a a a loss affects your head heart and spirit So you you you may experience a a a a a a a a a a variety of of emotions as part of of your grief work Confusion disorganisation fear guilt relief or or explosive emotions emotions are just a a a a a a few of the the emotions emotions emotions you may feel Sometime these emotions emotions will follow each other within a a a a short period of time Or they may occur simultaneously As strange as some of these emotions may seem they are normal and healthy Allow yourself to learn from these feelings And don’t be surprised if out of of nowhere you you suddenly experience surges of of grief grief even at at the most unexpected times These grief grief attacks can be frightening and leave you feeling overwhelmed They are however a a a a a natural response to the death of someone someone loved Find someone someone who understands your feeling and and will allow you you to talk about them Allow for Numbness
Feeling dazed or or numb when someone loved dies is is often part of of your early grief experience This numbness services as a a a a a a valuable purpose: it it gives your your emotions time to to catch up with what your your mind has told you you you This feeling helps create insulation from the the reality of the the death until you you you are more able to to to tolerate what you you don’t want to believe Be Tolerant of Your Physical and Emotional Limits
Your Your feelings of loss and sadness will probably leave you fatigued Your Your ability to think clearly and and make decisions may may be impaired and and your your low low energy level may may naturally slow you you you you down Respect what your your body and mind are telling you you you you Nurture yourself Get daily rest Eat balanced meals Lighten your your your schedule as as much as as possible Caring for for yourself yourself doesn’t mean mean feeling sorry for for yourself yourself it means you you you are using survival skills Develop a a a Support System
Reaching out to others and accepting support is often difficult particularly when you hurt so much But the most compassionate time is to find a a a a a a support system of caring friends and and relatives who will provide the understanding you you need Find those people who encourage you you you you to be yourself and and acknowledge your your feelings – both happy and and sad Make Use of Ritual
The funeral ritual does more than acknowledge the the death of someone loved It helps provide you with the the the support of caring people Most importantly the the funeral is is a a a a a a a way for you you you you to express your your grief outside yourself yourself If you you you you you you you eliminate this ritual you you you you you you often set yourself yourself up to repress your your your feelings and you you you you cheat everyone who cares
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