Page 140 - Advance Copy: Todd Kaufman, Author

TODD KAUFMAN
experience that seems to tip the apple cart.
In the case of ending panic attacks and the elevation
of anxiety to an unacceptable level, I have discovered the common denominator that holds people back, and I explained it in detail in Chapter five: The Path of Least Resistance. Since it is so critical that you remove this common denominator, I will end this practical manual by asking you to go back and reread Chapter Five.
Please.
As a therapist and an anxiety specialist, when I am working with clients and patients who want to tackle challenges, a barrier to their success I notice most often is the difficulty they have in letting go of what has become a core belief (even when it no longer serves them). Most of us, and even many mental health professionals, believe that anxiety is painful and bad, and that consequently, it needs to be fought to the death! After all, it has brought us, and those who know and love us, so much harm. Our intuitive response is understandable, and hardwired: Fight this thing off!
Even after clients learn what I shared in Chapter five, and even if they agree with it and think it is the most amazing insight they have ever heard, changing a core belief is still challenging. It too requires Intention, Repetition and Reward!
In treatment sessions, I listen carefully to a client’s language as an indicator of their impending success and possible barriers to success. It is common for me to hear phrases such as, “I think I may have licked this thing – I had an awesome week!” Here the ever-important Reward is present, yet it implies having won what is still framed in their head as a fight. Specifically, I notice language like “licked it,” or “beat it,” or other such parallels.
Our language, when we are not paying attention, can be a key indicator of our core beliefs. It is very difficult to objectively monitor your own spontaneous language. This is why it can be so helpful to engage a therapist or anxiety specialist to coach you though these changes. They are trained to carefully
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