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ĂƌĞ ƐŽŵĞ ƟƉƐ ĨŽƌ ůŝƐƚĞŶŝŶŐ ƚŽ LJŽƵƌ ĐŚŝůĚ͗ ƚƌĂƟŶŐ͕͟ LJŽƵ ĂƌĞ ǀĂůŝĚĂƟŶŐ ĂŶĚ ŶĂŵŝŶŐ
ͻ >ŝƐƚĞŶ ǁŝƚŚ ĨƵůů ĂƩĞŶƟŽŶ͘ zŽƵƌ ƚŚŽƐĞ ĨĞĞůŝŶŐƐ Ăƚ ƚŚĞ ƐĂŵĞ ƟŵĞ͘
ĐŚŝůĚ ŶĞĞĚƐ ƚŽ ŬŶŽǁ ƚŚĂƚ LJŽƵ ĂƌĞ ĨƵůůLJ
ƉƌĞƐĞŶƚ͕ ĞƐƉĞĐŝĂůůLJ ŝĨ ŚĞ ŝƐ ƵƉƐĞƚ Žƌ ĂŶ- ŽŽƉĞƌĂƟŽŶ
ŐƌLJ͘ dŚĂƚ ŵĞĂŶƐ ƚŚĂƚ LJŽƵ ĂƌĞ ŐŝǀŝŶŐ Śŝŵ
LJŽƵƌ ĨƵůů͕ ƵŶĚŝǀŝĚĞĚ ĂƩĞŶƟŽŶ͘ /Ĩ LJŽƵ Alright, you might say, so now that my
ĂƌĞ ƵŶůŽĂĚŝŶŐ ƚŚĞ ĚŝƐŚǁĂƐŚĞƌ Žƌ ĨŽůĚŝŶŐ child is speaking to me, it doesn’t mean
laundry, you are signaling to your child ƚŚĞLJ ĂƌĞ ĂĐƚƵĂůůLJ ĐŽŽƉĞƌĂƟŶŐ ǁŝƚŚ ŵĞ͘
ƚŚĂƚ LJŽƵ ŚĂǀĞ ŽƚŚĞƌ͕ ŵŽƌĞ ŝŵƉŽƌƚĂŶƚ As parents, we need our children to
things to do rather than listen to him. cooperate with us in order to get to
KĨ ĐŽƵƌƐĞ͕ LJŽƵ ĐĂŶ͛ƚ ĂůǁĂLJƐ ŐŝǀĞ LJŽƵƌ ƐĐŚŽŽů ŝŶ ƚŚĞ ŵŽƌŶŝŶŐ͕ ĐůĞĂŶ ƵƉ ĂŌĞƌ
ĨƵůů ĂƩĞŶƟŽŶ ƚŽ LJŽƵƌ ĐŚŝůĚ͕ ďƵƚ ŝĨ LJŽƵ ƚŚĞŵƐĞůǀĞƐ͕ ĚŽ ƚŚĞŝƌ ŚŽŵĞǁŽƌŬ͕ ĂŶĚ
ĂƌĞ ůŽŽŬŝŶŐ ƚŽ ŚĂǀĞ Ă ƌĞĂů ĐŽŶǀĞƌƐĂƟŽŶ͕ ũƵƐƚ ŐĞŶĞƌĂůůLJ ŝŶƚĞƌĂĐƚ ŝŶ Ă ƉƌŽĚƵĐƟǀĞ
ƚŚĂƚ͛Ɛ ƚŚĞ ŽŶůLJ ǁĂLJ ƚŽ ŚĂǀĞ ŝƚ͘ ŵĂŶŶĞƌ͘ /Ĩ ƚŚĞƌĞ ŝƐ Ă ůŽƚ Ă ůĂĐŬ ŽĨ ĐŽŵ-
ͻ ŽŶ͛ƚ ĂƐŬ ƋƵĞƐƟŽŶƐ Žƌ ŐŝǀĞ ĂĚ- ŵƵŶŝĐĂƟŽŶ Žƌ ŵŝƐĐŽŵŵƵŶŝĐĂƟŽŶ͕ ƚŚĞ
ǀŝĐĞ͘ /Ĩ LJŽƵƌ ĐŚŝůĚ ŝƐ ƵƉƐĞƚ͕ ŚĞ ǁŝůů ŵŽƐƚ ĚĂLJͲƚŽͲĚĂLJ ĨƵŶĐƟŽŶŝŶŐ ŽĨ ƚŚĞ ŚŽƵƐĞ-
ůŝŬĞůLJ ŶŽƚ ǁĂŶƚ LJŽƵ ƚŽ ĂƐŬ Śŝŵ ůŽƚƐ ŽĨ ŚŽůĚ ǁŝůů ďĞ ĞdžĂƐƉĞƌĂƟŶŐ ĂŶĚ ŵĞƐƐLJ͘
ƋƵĞƐƟŽŶƐ Žƌ ŐŝǀĞ Śŝŵ Ă ůŽƚ ŽĨ ĂĚǀŝĐĞ Here are some dos and don’ts that you
about the problem right away. Instead, ĐĂŶ ĨŽůůŽǁ ŝŶ ŽƌĚĞƌ ƚŽ ŐĂŝŶ ĐŽŽƉĞƌĂƟŽŶ͘
ŚĞ ǁŽƵůĚ ƉƌŽďĂďůLJ ƌĂƚŚĞƌ ŝĨ LJŽƵ ƐŝŐ-
Bulletin
naled to him that you are listening by DOs
saying short phrases like, “Hmm, I see” Describe. Talk about the problem in
or “Oh.” This way, he knows you are lis- ĨƌŽŶƚ ŽĨ LJŽƵ͕ ƌĂƚŚĞƌ ƚŚĂŶ ǁŚĂƚ LJŽƵƌ ĐŚŝůĚ
tening, but he doesn’t get bombarded is doing wrong. Say, “There are dirty
ǁŝƚŚ ĂĚǀŝĐĞ Žƌ ŐŽŽĚ ŝŶƚĞŶƟŽŶƐ͘ plates on the table,” or “There is dirty
ͻ ,ĞůƉ ŶĂŵĞ ƚŚĞ ĨĞĞůŝŶŐ͘ tŚĞŶ ĐůŽƚŚŝŶŐ ŽŶ ƚŚĞ ŇŽŽƌ͘͟ /ƚ͛Ɛ ĞĂƐŝĞƌ ĨŽƌ
your child needs to talk, he might not your child to concentrate on the prob-
ŚĂǀĞ Ăůů ƚŚĞ ǁŽƌĚƐ ĨŽƌ ǁŚĂƚ ŚĞ ŝƐ ĨĞĞůŝŶŐ͘ lem when someone describes it to him.
He might be able to tell you what the ex- 'ŝǀĞ ŝŶĨŽƌŵĂƟŽŶ͘ /ŶƐƚĞĂĚ ŽĨ ŐŝǀŝŶŐ
ƉĞƌŝĞŶĐĞ ŚĞ ŚĂĚ͕ ďƵƚ ŶŽƚ ƚŚĞ ĞŵŽƟŽŶƐ ĐŽŵŵĂŶĚƐ͕ ŐŝǀĞ ŝŶĨŽƌŵĂƟŽŶ͘ ^ĂLJ͕ ͞zŽƵƌ
ŚĞ ŚĂƐ ĂƌŽƵŶĚ ƚŚŽƐĞ ĞdžƉĞƌŝĞŶĐĞ͘ /Ĩ LJŽƵ ƉůĂƚĞ ŝƐ ŽŶ ƚŚĞ ƚĂďůĞ͕͟ /ŶƐƚĞĂĚ ŽĨ͕ ͞WƵƚ
ƐĂLJ ƐŽŵĞƚŚŝŶŐ ůŝŬĞ͕ ͞dŚĂƚ ƐŽƵŶĚƐ ĨƌƵƐ-
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