Page 269 - The Truth Landscape Format 2020 with next section introductions-compressed

Here we explore one possible way of expressing appreciation more proactively, consciously and with more clarity.

Perception Cycle Exercise

Exploring the appreciation process

The most effective form of appreciation I have experienced involves a three-part process.

1. Identify the “sense” that experienced the appreciation
2. Pinpoint the feeling you experience
3. Identify the reason for that feeling, the “because”

Sense Feeling Because
When I saw the flowers I felt so grateful to you They reminded me of how kind you are to me
When I tasted the pasta I felt so proud of you Of how good you are at cooking
When I heard you reading the kids I felt so happy I know how much the kids love hearing you tell stories
the story
When you bought me that xxxxx I felt so appreciated You put so much thought into buying me an original gift that meant
something to me
When you called me I felt so relieved and happy I had been worried about you
When I saw you looking so I felt overwhelmed It reminded me of how proud I am of how well you look after yourself
stunningly beautiful tonight
When you just sat and listened to my I felt reassured and loved You didn’t judge or condemn me, you showed unconditional love
problems without saying a word for myself

The significant element of three part appreciation is that the appreciator shares the details of her or his experience of the other person's action. These are quite
different statements than saying "You are wonderful!", "You are such a great guy.", "You are the greatest cook in the world.", "You are so beautiful." and so
on. Although such statements sound like the highest praise, there can be a big gap between what they intend to express and how they are actually received by
others. Here are some reasons why. Page269