Page 48 - Once a copper 10 03 2020

Cogsworth, I’ll use a pseudonym as his real name eludes my aging memory,
had no difficulty with normal walking, i.e. left leg right arm, right leg left arm,
but as soon as he formed up in a line some sort of weird change came over
him and he swung his left arm with his left leg and his right leg with his right
arm, very similar to the gait of an orang-utan. Try it, it’s weird!

In addition, Cogsworth had very long arms, extremely long arms! At five-ten,
he had a reach of 81 inches. He was also directly behind me in the squad
and continually kicked the daylights out of my heels. I always knew when
Cogsworth went out of step because his hands failed to appear at my left
and right shoulders in time with mine, since he had to swing them a bit wider
to avoid slapping me under the armpits at every step.

After many wasted and failed hours trying to knock he tick-tock out of Cogsy,
TT finally gave up and told him to sit out the drill sessions.

As the weeks passed on the parade ground, we started to take shape as a
squad, minus Cogsworth, moving in unison. It really started to feel good and
as each day passed, I enjoyed it more and more.

When we started marching to music, the first tune that roared over the
loudspeakers on the parade square literally had us in fits of laughter. Imagine,
your dressed up as smart as you like, in a line that’s straight as an arrow, you
start marching in time as a unit, then the music starts and it’s the Monty
Python theme tune! The tune was written as The Liberty Bell by American
march music composer John Philip Sousa and it used to be played regularly
outside Buckingham Palace – that was until it became better known as the
theme tune used by an anarchic group of eccentric comedians!

Once we got over the novelty, it became the favourite of us all and certainly
created a sea of smiling faces both on and off the parade square.
Marching was great fun, a spectacle to watch when performed well and it
made us all more disciplined in our attitude – something I feel is sadly lacking
in some of societies younger folk today.

Role Plays

As the weeks passed, the training became more enjoyable with a class of
enquiring minds. We all grew in confidence with each positive exam result
and we really started to bond as a unit.

Three weeks in and the course was gathering a momentum of its own as we
all became used to the classwork, marching everywhere and acquaintances
turned into friendships.

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