Page 12 - My Indigo Sun July - August

I shared that playful ritual with my business The Universe sends us these mirrors as gifts —
partner, Trish. When tension would arise, I’d often uncomfortable ones, but still gifts if we
pretend to pull out two finger-guns and say, can look at them differently. When we blame
“Hey you. You’re doing it again.” We’d laugh, others, we miss the gold buried in the shadow.
soften, and then talk through the issue. Ultimately, Shadow Work invites us into a
Working closely with someone is like being in relationship with our whole selves. It helps us
a marriage and, interestingly, her mom and stop fighting with the parts we’ve pushed away.
my dad were born on the same day, the same We all carry contradictions: the wise one and the
year! Our parents had the same energy! fool, the brave and the scared, the nurturer and
When Trish and I found that out, we knew we the needy child.
were fated to meet. Over five years of
working together, we changed through Above my desk is a quote I live by: “The only
knowing each other. She became more like thing I am sure of is that everything changes.”
me; I became more like her. That’s what That includes us. We evolve by learning to
Shadow Work in relationship can do — it embrace what we once rejected. When you meet
helps us reclaim and live the parts of that part of yourself again — disguised as your
ourselves we’ve projected, denied or partner, coworker, or friend — it’s not an enemy.
rejected. It’s you, asking for inclusion and when we finally

understand that, we can smile and say, “Oh,
Our Character is Our Fate there you are again.” The shadow isn’t our
And fate, with its wry smile, often brings us enemy. It’s just the part of us waiting to be
people who embody the very things we need welcomed home.
to see in ourselves. That person who irritates
you? They are a mirror. You don’t need to
“get rid of” the quality you see in them — you Rebeca Eigen
need to include it. If it keeps showing up, it’s
yours.

Now, I’m not saying we must like everyone.
We’re not meant to be close with everyone
we meet. But when you notice a repeating
pattern, that’s the clue: this is your work.

Instead of blaming, ask:
Where do I lie to myself?
Where am I not listening to my own
needs?
Where have I become the very thing I
judge?

12 - My Indigo Sun