Page 25 - THE ENEMY IN-A-ME

THE ENEMY IN-A-ME

What are we going to do about our weaknesses, our habits, and the trail of
blood we leave behind? What about the mess we left behind? What about
all those twisted, mutilated, confused, suicidal, disturbed people we left
behind while we were growing up?

It's not just drinking that's in question, but what are you trying to drown,
when you drink? There is a problem behind the problem. And everyone is
saying get over the problem. But the problem behind the problem is what
needs to be dealt with. God wants to do something mighty in our lives. Any
of us can fall or fail, and no one is exempt from making mistakes, but there's
a difference in falling in the mud and lying in it.

MARK 5:5 Night and day among the tombs and on the mountains he was

always shrieking and screaming and beating and bruising and cutting
himself with stones.

He is not at home, he is not with his family, and he’s not in his ministry. Night
and day he was in the mountains and the tombs crying. This is the man that
no one could control, the he-man, the rough and tough guy, telling people
I'm grown; I'll do what I want to do. But when he got by himself he was
crying. Saying; “I don't want to be this critical. I don't want to come home
angry and pick and nag at my wife. I'm doing it, but I don't want to do it. I do

not want to be the kind of father my father was. I don't want to be
indifferent. I don't want to be busy. I don't want to be cold. I don't want to be
distracted. I don't want to be lazy. I don't want to be mean to my wife. I
don't want to do things that will cause my children to hate me. I don't want
to be a strung out on dope; I don't want to be a pot head. I don't want to be
a drunkard. I don't want to be a homosexual. I don't want to cruise clubs and
bars and crawl through alleys. I don't want to be unfaithful to my wife. Deep
down in my heart, I don't want to compromise my integrity. For I do not
understand my own actions, for I don’t do what I want, but I do the very
thing that I hate. For I know that nothing good dwells in my esh, for I have
the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.” [Romans 7:15-25]

He was crying in the tombs, where nobody else could hear, but God. I'm so
glad God can hear. [Jeremiah 33:3]

Christ is the Healer
Page 25