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“As I was about to say, my new slogan is for our great military — Make America Fierce in Action. My five-star generals told me that their soldiers are tired of sitting around. They don’t want drills. They want action! Get ready to see some tremendous fire and fury. Bolton and Pompeo agree that MAFIA is pure genius.”
“Mr. President, are you saying that you will start a war to relieve our military men and women of boredom?” Garrett pressed.
“Why not? That’s what other countries do. Look at Maduro in Venezuela. I hate the guy, but his Army loves him. They’re fighting 24/7. And my new friend, Jay Bolsnaro in Brazil. He’s planning to do the same thing. By the time 2020 rolls around, our fantastic military will be winning all over the world, and I will be re-elected with 538 electoral votes. That’s 100%. Just you wait, you’ll see,” the president taunted.
“One more thing, that Witch-Hunter Mueller investigation was a terrible thing. I was subjected to an illegal takedown. We can’t ever let that happen to another Republican president again. No one could take it like I did. Isn’t that right Mitch?”
“Ahem, yes sir, Mr. President,” Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell rasped from the shadows in the briefing room.
This story will be updated as new information becomes available.