Page 91 - ConvinceThemFlip

work your ABC: attitude, body language, and congruence
No one likes talking
to a wall. Respond
to people, and the
connection you make
will get stronger.
chaotic and we become ill
at ease.
When you are making
connections with other
people, feedback is respon-
sible for the ongoing quality
of the encounter. Imagine
playing tennis by yourself.
If you bang the ball over the net and it doesn’t come back,
you’ll have to bang another one over. And another. Pretty
soon you’ll get fed up.
People who don’t give feedback appear boring and baf-
fling, and their behavior becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Connecting is a two-way arrangement, in which the par-
ticipants encourage each other along. If you look and act
interested, I assume you are interested. If you don’t react
or respond, I assume you are not interested and I wish I
was someplace else. Use your body and your face to show
your interest. Lean forward, lean sideways, sit on the edge
of your seat, smile, frown, shrug your shoulders, throw
your hands in the air, nod, laugh, cry . . . respond! When
your boss, or a client, or a colleague speaks with you, give
feedback. A constant frustration I hear from employees is
about bosses who don’t give feedback.
Watch how others give feedback, especially people you
admire. Look for counterproductive feedback—feedback
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