Page 31 - Advanced Romance

28 Advanced Romance*
machine, or etc. As Joni Mitchell laments: “Sex sells everything and sex kills.”19
It’s a wonder any relationship lasts given the stresses that American culture puts on it. The reaction that happened when the U.S. outgrew its Puritanical roots may plunge us into Sodom and Gomorra hell, or deliver us to an enlightened love life. Only time will tell. My hope is that once we transcend the fear of worrying about going to literal Hell for having unmarried sex or divorcing, we will become much more spiritual in our couplings, much more aware that there are many ways to express and enjoy love other than in plunging into STD, STE and baby-risking behaviors. (STE – sexually transmitted emotions. More on that later.)
Fisher also found a biological source for the grass is greener, the feeling that if you just had that other woman or man, you’d be happy.
In spite of the evolutionary trajectory of loving ... lust, romantic love and attachment can ignite in any combination... Many of us also have periods in our lives when these three mating drives ... do not focus on the same person.
You can feel profound attachment for a long-term spouse—while you feel romantic passion for someone in your office or your social circle—while you feel sex drive as you read a book, watch a movie, or do something else unrelated to either partner...
Once lust and romantic love evolved to drive