Page 114 - The Irony Board

Into the Cosmos

Cold storage

The maker with his tweezer
Could have (at no extra cost)
Provided us a freezer
With automatic defrost.

Continuing in a theojocular vein, this poem repeats a common
criticism of the alleged omnicreator: why make problems for us poor
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mortals? The rationalization of evil, pain, and misery as either
illusory or part of some necessary scheme of trial and redemption
has been made by world religions, major and minor, for millennia.
Beside functioning as a defense of political or ecclesiastical status,
these arguments do provide some solace for bereavement and
support for self-sacrifice. The irrationality of the idea, however, has
been satirized often, most notably in Voltaire’s Dr. Pangloss.
The subject of this piece is the human mind, a storage device in
which unpleasant memories and disruptive behavior patterns are
frozen. The supposed designer of that bioelectric machine, given his
high technical competence and unlimited budget, might easily have
pinched a few nerves here and there, giving his creation the ability to
melt away dysfunctional data and programs. Have we the best of all
possible brains? The warranty on our most major appliance has
expired; if we want to improve its performance, we’ll have to work
on it ourselves.

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Theojocular and omnicreator are Gluckman’s neologisms; two among many in
these works.

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