Page 45 - Fables volume 2

Every so often your jailers spray you with some poison when they
decide that your scratching has rendered you unpresentable to the
paying customers.”
“I’m used to it. Now, beat it. I’ve got to lick my privates.”
“That can wait!” Sparrow hopped with impatience. “Listen: do you
know what is on the food chain between a parasite and a predator or
scavenger?”
“Nyaaaah!” Cougar yawned, rattling the less phlegmatic occupants
of the primate house across the pathway. “They all want a piece of
somebody else. But only predators have to work for it.”
“Not so! Have you ever heard of symbiosis?”
Cougar cocked his head. “Simba-osis? Some kind of big cat
disease?”
Sparrow blinked and whistled a descending note. “It’s two
different kinds of creatures doing something for each other, like pilot
fish and sharks, or people and dogs—”
“I’d like a puppy,” mused the toothy feline. “Maybe for dessert.”
“Stay focused, will you? I’m about to present you with an
unprecedented opportunity to participate in a brand-new symbiotic
partnership. You’ve got parasites: they bother you, right? I would
love to eat them. And I’ve got very good vision. No problem spotting
them. I can land on you anywhere you have an itch and remove its
cause. I benefit, you benefit. See?”
Cougar scowled. “That is undignified. You swallow bugs while I
have to swallow my pride. And restrain my almost overwhelming
desire to pounce on anything that moves. You’re asking a lot. No
sale.”
Now it was Sparrow’s turn to be perplexed. She thought she’d had
it all figured out, and never doubted her ability to put over the deal.
Distressed, she lost control of her bowels.
“Hey!” Cougar’s bellow made her flutter three feet straight up
before returning to her spot. He wiped his eyes with one massive
paw. “Watch what you’re doing! Was that intentional or do you birds
just defecate randomly?”
“No! Sorry! I can poop with great precision when and where I
want. That was an accident.”

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