Page 33 - Unlikely Stories 3

Cyberceutics Deletes Obsessogens

With Ping-a-Ding

From Fantastic Transactions, volume 3 (2006)

“Dad: what is it? Why did I have to drop everything and fly down
here?”
Doctor Barfuss put his hand on his son’s shoulder. The boy had
become a young man, outstripping his sire in height and weight.
“I’ll not mince words with you, Junior. I’ve got inoperable brain
cancer and my days are numbered. In two or three months you’ll be
minus one parent.”
If Barfuss, Sr. had been expecting shock or emotional collapse from
his only child, he would have been disappointed.
“I’m sorry to hear that. I wish we’d had more time together.” They
sat down on opposite sides of a low table on the veranda of Doctor
Barfuss’s villa. The Bay of Alterado glittered below.
“Well, I do, too—if it’s any consolation. After the divorce your
mother took you—and a good deal of money—away from me and
went back to the States. She said you would be brought up properly
and receive a good education. Were you and did you?”
“Yes, I’d say that I’m on a fairly straight path. I’ve kept my nose
clean and made it through a very good MBA program. In fact, if you
hadn’t tracked me down I was planning to leave today for New York:
I’ve been offered a position at Lézard Frères.”
“My boy, I can top that. Cyberceutics LLC is going to need a new
CEO. I will teach you all you need to know in about two weeks. Your
book-learning will do the rest. All I ask is that you keep my death a
secret: we have the same name and our customers deal with us online
exclusively. If you don’t take this operation in hand—call it a family
business once you’re the boss—then I’ve got plenty of underlings
champing at the bit to be my heir. They get as little information about
my medical condition as possible.”
“Cyberceutics?” Young Barfuss searched his memory. “Isn’t that
some kind of self-help cult?”
The old man nodded approvingly. “Close enough. We have three
main subsidiaries, each based in a different country thanks to

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